CONTINUITY Film

Critic Consensus Top Ten Films of 2011

2011-12-29T10:56:00.017-05:00

It's that time of the year again, Ladies & Germs, for Continuity Film's Critic Consensus Top Ten Films of 2011.

First things first: The Formula.

I take the Top Ten Lists of the National Critics from The Austin Chronicle to the Washington Post (which are compiled on Metacritic.com) and I allocate the following scores to the list:

#1(10 points), 2(9), 3(8), 4(7), 5(6),6(5),7(4),8(3),9(2),10(1).

Criteria: Some critics have a tendency to bend the rules in their favor. This is like a student not doing the homework assignment. This is a TOP TEN List, not a Top Eleven, or a Top Ten and 1/2, this is not an Alphabetical-Top-Ten either. TOP TEN. Period.

Anyone who breaks that simple rule is DQ'd. Sorry, try again next year. (For the record, 80 Critics complied and 15 were DQ'd, not bad, that's 84.21%).

So, without further ado, here is the Critic Consensus Top Ten Films of 2011.

10. Margaret (119)
9. The Artist (142)
8. Take Shelter (145)
7. Hugo (148)
6. The Descendants (155)
5. Melancholia (160)
4. Certified Copy (165)
3. Drive (195)
2. A Separation (200)
1. The Tree of Life (341)

Thus far, I have ONLY seen "Hugo", "Drive", & "The Tree of Life."

I absolutely LOVED "Drive" and it was MY #1 Film of 2011. I thought "Hugo" was very good but I didn't love it (I didn't see it in 3D either and the theater only had the center-speaker working) but it was a film-lover's film through and through.

"The Tree of Life." There were sequences in their that were some of the most beautiful scenes EVER filmed. Overall, it was good, a little wonky at times, and extremely esoteric (but being a Malick fan, I was expecting that). If the film was ONLY the scenes in Waco, Texas, it might've gone down as on of the greatest films of recent memory. But Malick couldn't help himself. I can't wait to rewatch it b/c there is NO one like Malick working in film today.

Other films that I did see. I did see "Meek's Cutoff" (11th, 105) which I did NOT like at all. In fact, I hated it. I did see "Beginners" (19th, 65) which I thought was fantastic. Christopher Plummer is a lock for Best Supporting Actor in a very personal film stuffed with memory, love, and heartbreak.

I did see "War Horse" (42nd, 26) and I was extremely underwhelmed. I was expecting an epic, overdue WWI film (it does have flashes of WWI brilliance) but it gets bogged-down in sappy and melodramatic storytelling. This movie should've been Rated-R and graphic as hell. Spielberg cheats a lot in this movie and he reuses a ton of his old trick that are painfully telegraphed. If any of you have seen Bresson's minimalist masterpiece "Au Hasard Balthazar" (1966), you will notice a thematic element borrowed and inserted into the "War Horse" plot-line. I personally believe that Bresson executed it much better than Spielberg.

I did see "The Adventures of Tintin" (134rd, 3). It was an entertaining Indiana-Jones-esque adventure tale and it was glorious in 3D.

I did see "Super 8" (48th, 20). Again, it was awkward and I didn't really like it. It was surreal b/c the entire time you're watching it you are witnessing J.J. pay homage to Spielberg. It was distracting. It was like watching someone channel a dead-person. Wouldn't you rather just talk to the dead person?

In the next couple of weeks, I will be seeing "Midnight in Paris" (30th, 35), "The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo" (39th, 29), "The Descendants" (6), "Moneyball" (15th, 90), "Senna" (32nd, 33), "Win Win" (44th, 24), "Rise of the Planet of the Apes" (43rd, 24), "Margin Call" (37th, 31), etc.

Lastly, in terms of Best Picture, here are my predictions (in alphabetical order):

-The Artist (142) 9th
-A Dangerous Method (58) 21st
-The Descendants (155) 6th
-Drive (195) 3rd
-The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo (29) 39th
-Hugo (148) 7th
-Moneyball (90) 15th
-Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy (94) 12th
-The Tree of Life (341) 1st
-War Horse (26) 42nd

I nailed ALL Ten noms last year, but this year is much harder.

My reasons: There is NO strong Animation contender and the Academy DOES NOT favor Foreign Films (therefore, scratch both "A Separation" and "Certified Copy" out of the Top Ten).

I added "A Dangerous Method" b/c of Cronenberg. I selected "War Horse" b/c of Spielberg and they need a Feel-Good-Movie nom. "The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo" b/c of Fincher. "Moneyball" b/c of Pitt.

I was hesitant to include "Drive", but I think the Academy will come around. I did not select Von Trier's "Melancholia" b/c they are going to blackball him.

That's all folks. Until next year. Enjoy the list and if you want to know where your favorite film is, shoot me an email in the comments section.

Happy New Year!

Critic Consensus Top Ten Films of 2010

2011-01-19T13:14:00.000-05:00

It's that time of the year again, Ladies and Germs, for Continuity Film's Critic Consensus Top Ten Films of 2010.

First things first: The Formula.

I take the Top Ten Lists of the National Critics from The Austin Chronicle to the Washington Post (which are compiled on Metacritic.com) and I allocate the following scores to the list:

#1(10 points), 2(9), 3(8), 4(7), 5(6),6(5),7(4),8(3),9(2),10(1).

Criteria: Some critics have a tendency to bend the rules in their favor. This is like a student not doing the homework assignment. This is a TOP TEN List, not a Top Eleven, or a Top Ten and 1/2, this is not an Alphabetical-Top-Ten either. TOP TEN. Period.

Anyone who breaks that simple rule is DQ'd. Sorry, try again next year. (For the record, 79 Critics complied and 19 were DQ'd, not bad, that's 80.61%).

So, without further ado, here is the Critic Consensus Top Ten Films of 2010.

10. 127 Hours (125)
9. The Ghost Writer (126)
8. The Kids Are All Right (141)
7. Carlos (153)
6. The King's Speech (159)
5. Toy Story 3 (202)
4. Inception (219)
3. Black Swan (234)
2. Winter's Bone (240)
1. The Social Network (425)

Thus far, I have not seen "The King's Speech", "Carlos", and "127 Hours."

Although I really loved "Greenberg" (29th), I was disappointed that it didn't garner more recognition and I was surprised that "True Grit" (17th) only received 94 points.

The highest rated Documentary? "Exit Through the Gift Shop" (14th).

"The Town" (which I haven't seen yet) got absolutely ZERO love from the Critics, only getting 12 points (52nd) and tied with "Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part I."

I was equally surprised that "How to Train Your Dragon" did not receive much love either. I thought that film was fantastic. (7 points).

And some whacky critic out there gave "Predators" a 3!!!

Finally, my prediction for the Academy's Best Picture Nominations are (in alphabetical order)...

-127 Hours (125) 10th
-Black Swan (234) 3rd
-The Fighter (50) 22nd
-Inception (219) 4th
-The Kids Are All Right (141) 8th
-The King's Speech (159) 6th
-The Social Network (425) 1st
-Toy Story 3 (202) 5th
-True Grit (94) 17th
-Winter's Bone (240) 2nd

"Carlos" is ineligible for an Oscar becaused it premeired on British TV.

I was looking for this year's "The Blind Side" (an Unranked Nominee) but I can't think of anything THAT outlandish.

But...the Academy definitely has a tendency to disappoint (ummm, "Star Trek", last year)...so, knowing that the Academy stretched the Nominees from 5 to 10 to incorporate a slot for an Indie, a Genre, and a Pixar, I mean, Animation, my gut tells me that...

"Winter's Bone" will be this year's SNUB. Yeah, I know, a #2 ranked film is going to be snubbed from a nomination? It wouldn't be the first time. "WALL-E" (1) and "The Dark Knight" (2) were snubbed in 2008. "The Diving Bell and Butterfly" (2) in 2007 and "United 93" (1) in 2006. Again, this was BEFORE they flexed the noms to 10.

Which film, do you ask, will replace "Winter's Bone" as the final nom?

Well, since I already included "The Fighter" (22nd) on my nom list, it has to be a film that is backed by a studio renown for campaigning for an Oscar nom...

Warner Brothers and Legendary Pictures produced "The Town" and it has all the hallmarks of an Oscar nom.

So, expect the unexpected next week when the Academy releases its Best Picture Nominees. And I have a feeling that there will be a dark horse write-in candidate that will shake up the whole field and cause the blogosphere to spontaneously combust.

Dare I say, "Shutter Island"???

Stranger things have happened...

Critic Consensus Top Ten Films of 2009

2010-01-06T12:59:00.012-05:00

The Critics have spoken.

Welcome, fellow cinephiles, to Continuity Film's Critic Consensus Top Ten Films of 2009.

Some of you may not be familiar with this post nor the Critic Consensus, so I will gladly explain myself.

First things first: The Formula.

It's really easy. Even my wife, who is notoriously horrid in math, can figure this out.

I take the Top Ten Lists of the National Critics from The Austin Chronicle to the Washington Post (which are compiled on Metacritic.com) and I allocate the following scores to the list:

#1(10 points), 2(9), 3(8), 4(7), 5(6),6(5),7(4),8(3),9(2),10(1).

Criteria: Some critics have a tendency to bend the rules in their favor. This is like a student not doing the homework assignment. This is a TOP TEN List, not a Top Eleven, or a Top Ten and 1/2, this is not an Alphabetical-Top-Ten either. TOP TEN. Period.

Anyone who breaks that simple rule is DQ'd. Sorry, try again next year.

Coincidentally, the Academy Awards flexed their Nominations from 5 to 10 this year. At first, I was not in favor of the extra Noms (Who needs more? They never get 5 right, let alone 10! They just want to make their own Top Ten and make more money!) but I have come around to the reality that this is a good thing. It is a good thing for Indies, Animations, and Genre Flicks.

However, I see a major problem brewing this year with Foreign Films, but that is a rant for another post for another day.

Upon further ado, here is the Critic Consensus Top Ten Films of 2009.

10. In the Loop (72)
9. The White Ribbon (73)
8. Fantastic Mr. Fox (77)
7. Summer Hours (92)
6. Precious (97)
5. Inglorious Basterds (134)
4. Up (142)
3. A Serious Man (155)
2. Up in the Air (201)
1. The Hurt Locker (296)

This was a banner year for Science Fiction films:

"District 9" was 12th (69), "Star Trek" was 14th (46), "Avatar" was 16th (44), and "Moon" was (39).

I was shocked that Marc Weber's brilliant "(500) Days of Summer" only placed 22nd (34). In my opinion, probably the best and most honest Romantic-Comedy since "Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind."

I was not shocked that Clint Eastwood's "Invictus" placed 69th (8) (word around the campfire is that it's nothing more than a polished, yet, cliched sports movie), one notch about Drew Barrymore's "Whip It" (7). However, I guarantee that "Invictus" will sneak into the Academy's Nominations by the end of the year and will pass over a more deserved movie.

In fact, if I was a betting man, this is how I believe the Academy Awards will be when they are announced in February (remember, they display them in alphabetical order first.)

-Avatar (44) 16th
-District 9 (69) 12th
-The Hurt Locker (296) 1st
-Inglorious Basterds (134) 5th
-Invictus (8) 69th
-Precious (97) 6th
-A Serious Man (155) 3rd
-Up (142) 4th
-Up in the Air (201) 2nd
-Where the Wild Things Are (71) 11th

I would be shocked beyond belief if the Academy did not select James Cameron's "Avatar." Sure, the story is recycled from all of his previous films, but the watershed moment that we all experienced while watching the film with sunglasses on in 3D changed the landscape not only of film, but of entertainment in general. ESPN already announced its 3D channel to launch this Summer just in time for the World Cup. 3D-ready TVs will flood the marketplace by the end of the year. Other channels will launch their own 3D stations. Other movies will adopt Cameron's methods and we will see a whole slew of 3D titles. "Avatar" has already altered the path of this entire decade.

Like I said above, "Invictus" (because of Eastwood) will slip past a more worthy nomination ("The White Ribbon", "Star Trek").

That takes us to "Star Trek." I can't see the Academy nominating 3 Sci-Fi films (heck, they may only nom "Avatar"), even though "Star Trek" is an amazing movie.

"Up" will be this year's recipient of the Pixar/Disney nomination slot after the Academy criminally ignored "WALL-E" last season.

"Precious" will be this year's Indie-Darling-Film nomination.

And finally, I have Spike Jonze's "Where the Wild Things Are" edging out the two Foreign Films ("The White Ribbon" and "Summer Hours"). I thought "Wild Things" was technically brilliant, but I wasn't overally impressed by the storyline.

If any of you out there are interested in finding a movie outside of the Critic Consensus Top Ten, write it in the Comment section and I'll respond immediately.

For example, "Hey, I saw 'The Hangover' like 3 times in the theater and I laughed my ass off. Where is it?"

"The Hangover" (6) 81st.

OR, "Yeah, I saw that Adam Sandler movie. Funny something. I don't remember the title, but it was like 30-minutes longer than it needed to be."

"Funny People" (27) 29th.

And finally, "What about 'G.I. Joe: Rise of Cobra'? That movie was sick! I mean, it was nowhere near as awesome as the Animated Movie in the late-80s when Sergeant Slaughter beats the shit out of everybody, and then Peter Jackson uses the same exact scene in 'Return of the King', but instead of Sergeant Slaughter, that would be weird, it was that fat guy who was once a skinny kid from 'The Goonies', Samwise, who kills Goblins for the US of A!"

"G.I. Joe: Rise of Cobra" (0) N/A.

Any critic that would have voted for that movie would have been brought out to a pasture and shot.

Enjoy the list, I will check back in when the Academy officially announces their Top Ten Nominations.

There's bound to some sort of controversy.

There always is.

Alternate Movie History Part I: Worst Working Titles

2009-02-24T10:30:00.001-05:00

In a town called Big Whiskey, an old, grizzled angel-of-death cowboy walks into a bar and unleashes hell on its patrons as he decimates an entire gang of wrongdoers.

He exits the bar, and in the pouring rain, he warns the rest of the town:

"You better bury Ned right! Better not go cuttin' up, nor otherwise harm no whores. Or I'll come back and kill every one of you sons-o-bitches."

This is a scene from Clint Eastwood's Western masterpiece. Perhaps you've heard of it, it's called...

..."The Cut Whore Killings" (1992).

What? The Cut Whore What?

You got it right, "The Cut Whore Killings", at least, that's what David Webb Peoples (screewriter) originally titled the film.

We all know it better as "Unforgiven" (1992).

Thank God. And Clint, for that matter.

Imagine seeing the trailer for this film back in 1992. Everyone in the audience is jazzed, Clint is back as a cowboy, this Western looks dark and brooding, this looks unbelievable, and then...

..."The Cut Whore Killings" title card splashes across the screen.

Cue "collective audience groan" sound-effect.

This is not the first time filmmakers made the correct decision regarding Working Titles.

There is a long, brutal history of downright terrible titles that almost made it to the silver screen near you.

Let's see if you recognize this movie...

A spaceship crew is eating dinner around a table in a mess-hall. They are cracking jokes between one another.

One of the crewman's laugh turns into a choking noise. The other members of the crew laugh even louder.

The choking crewman is now violently gagging and holding his chest. The others try to the restrain the man, thinking that he might be experiencing a cardiac arrest.

Suddenly, a burst of blood explodes from the crewman's chest. He falls onto the table and a vicious-looking alien crawls out of his torso and scampers away.

Remember that scene? How can anyone forget it. Of course, it's from Ridley Scott's Sci-Fi/Horror masterpiece...

..."Star Beast" (1979).

Yep. "Star Beast."

In space, no one can hear you scream.

And with a title like that, no one would be in the audience to scream either.

Good thing Mr. Scott and the Producers came up with the title, "Alien" (1979).

How about some of these famous quote and their NOT so famous Working Titles...

-"Of all the gin joints, in all the towns, in all the world, she walks into mine."

"Everbody Comes to Rick's" (1942), aka, "Casablanca."

-"I'm not mad, I'm proud of you. You took your first pinch like a man and you learn two great things in your life. Look at me, never rat on your friends and always keep your mouth shut."

"Wiseguy" (1990), aka, "Goodfellas."

-"Just what do you think you're doing, Dave?"

"How the Solar System Was Won" (1968), aka, "2001: A Space Odyssey."

-"You don't understand. I coulda had class. I coulda been a contender. I coulda been somebody, instead of a bum, which is what I am, let's face it. It was you, Charley."

"The Hook" (1954), aka, "On the Waterfront."

-"Snap out of it!"

"The Bride and the Wolf" (1987), aka, "Moonstruck."

Okay, pop quiz hot shot...

...Which film won Best Picture at the 2007 Academy Awards?

That would be "Infernal Affairs" (2006), aka, "The Departed."

...Which film is generally regarded as Hitchcock's best film?

"From Among the Dead" (1958), aka, "Vertigo."

...Which film is known as the first Film Noir masterpiece?

"The Gent from Frisco" (1941), aka, "The Maltese Falcon."

...Which Billy Wilder film is considered one of the best comedies of all-time?

"Not Tonight, Josephine!" (1959), aka, "Some Like It Hot."

...Which film was AFI's original #1 film?

"The American", aka, "Citizen Kane."

The following films listed below have garnered an Honorable Mention as the Worst Working Titles EVER.

Enjoy!

-"Black Mask" (1994), aka, "Pulp Fiction."
-"The Greatest Gift" (1946), aka, "It's a Wonderful Life."
-"Oil!" (2007), aka, "There Will Be Blood."
-"The Man Who Came to Play" (1978), aka, "The Deer Hunter."
-"Rope Burns" (2004), aka, "Million Dollar Baby."
-"La Bella Confusione" (1963), aka, "8 1/2."
-"The Body" (1986), aka, "Stand By Me."
-"King of the Jungle" (1994), aka, "The Lion King."
-"Glory for Me" (1946), aka, "The Best Years of Our Lives."
-"Blood and Guts" (1970), aka, "Patton."
-"Watch the Skies" (1977), aka, "Close Encounters of the Third Kind."
-"Dead Right" (1971), aka, "Dirty Harry."
-"The Human Interest Story" (1951), aka, "Ace in the Hole."
-"A Boy's Life" (1982), aka, "E.T."
-"Would I Lie to You?" (1982), aka, "Tootsie."
-"Shoeless Joe" (1989), aka, "Field of Dreams."

Trailer Trash: How Bad Trailers Ruin Good Movies. Exhibit A: "In Bruges" (2008).

2009-02-13T08:26:00.024-05:00

"In Bruges" (2008) is a great movie. Probably in my Top Ten of 2008.

It's that good.

The theatrical trailer is trash. It completely strips the film of its emotional core. It is a classic Marketing FUBAR.

Trailer Trash: How Bad Trailers Ruin Good Movies is a new segment to Continuity Film.

Before I go in-depth with the trailer, I'd like to start first by looking at the Poster (see above).

The poster for "In Bruges" is a blood-splattered post-card. The 3 Main Characters (Harry, Ray, & Ken) are split in three panels, each with Bruges scenery in the background, and they all hold guns. The tagline on the bottom right is: "Shoot first. Sightsee later." Colin Farrell's character Ray is in the center panel, holding a revolver in one hand and a pint of beer in the other.

The poster is terrible and the Marketing Department of Focus Features should fire whoever the heck was in charge of this film.

"Shoot first. Sightsee later." Wow. How original. Yeah, you know what, I, "White Male Demographic 18-34" is so ensconced in my XBOX 360 and I'm so sick of my fridge full of beer and cold pizza that I need to drop everything and see a film with a tagline like that! Oh wait, sorry, I will go because Colin Farrell, who I have a man-crush on, is holding a revolver and a beer, a BEER, how cool is that?

Let's take a look at this masterpiece of a trailer, shall we?

I remember seeing the trailer in the movie theater sometime last year with Rebecca. I specifically remember telling her, "Wow. That looks embrassing."

The trailer starts off with Ray (Farrell) in a confessional booth with a Priest. It is revealed that Ray has committed murder. The Priest asks him who. Ray says, "You Father."

Blam. Blam. Blam.

Cuts to a bunch of people saying "Bruges."

We then see a bunch of random images with sub-title cards: "They Were Supposed to Disappear"..."Blend In"..."And Wait For the Boss to Call"...

We hear a phone message of a bunch of f-bombs being bleeped-out (which, btw, is annoying as hell to listen to in a theater).

More sub-title cards: "In Bruges..."..."If You Can't Hide Out"..."You Get Taken Out."

Suddenly, there is a guitar riff from that crap-song "The Impression That I Get" by The Mighty Mighty Bosstones. Like I didn't hear that song enough from my Sophmore year roomate in College. And that was 1999.

It is followed by a series of MTV-Video Circa 1999 fast-cuts of random images.

Finally, to put a cherry on top of an already horrific trailer, they throw in the dwarf/midget for good measure.

It's funny, because Colin Farrell's character Ray, perfectly sums up what I felt, and what I imagine 90% of the audience felt after they watched this horrorshow...

"If I'd grown up in a farm and was retarded, Bruges might impress me, but I didn't, so it doesn't..."

Ditto.

Okay, after seeing that trailer, would you honestly think that it would get nominated for Best Original Screenplay?

No? Well, it did.

After seeing the trailer, would you honestly think that Colin Farrell and Brendan Gleeson would both be nominated for Best Supporting Actor in a Comedy/Musical at the Golden Globes?

No? They did.

In fact, it is probably Colin Farrell's best performance.

Wow, Anthony, since the trailer doesn't do the film justice at all, what is the film actually about?

Well, I'm glad you finally asked.

"In Bruges" is a dark comedy. In fact, it's more of a dark dramedy (drama/comedy).

The closest film I could compare it to would be Gary Fleder's "Things to Do in Denver When You're Dead" (1995), which is an underrated film that got caught in the post-Pulp Fiction maelstrom.

The film is about two Irish guys who have been sent to Bruges. Bruges?

It's in Belgium.

It is the oldest Medieval city in all of Europe (or, so the movie says).

We eventually find out that these two blokes are hitmen who are taking a leave of absence after a botched hit.

Ken (Gleeson) is the veteran. He's a normal guy, just like you and me. He's not a ruthless, by-the-numbers, assassin. He's a fat guy who likes history and art and he's loving Bruges. He's the professional.

Ray (Farrell) is the rookie. He's a hot-headed blowhard who hates Bruges, hates history, and would piss on the Mona Lisa if he was drunk enough. He's green. He's new at this game and he's still trying to figure out the rules.

Ken and Ray are waiting for word from their boss, Harry (Fiennes), the expletive-laden madman who we primarily hear through the receiver of a telephone.

That's all you need to know.

The film is at times hilarious, touching, funny, poignant, and startingly original.

"In Bruges" is a character-driven film about hitmen with feelings. They are not video-game-automatons who shoot first and ask questions last.

These guys shoot first and cry about it later on.

They are normal guys who have a job to do. They don't necessarily like it, but it's all they know.

They're like blue collar hitmen.

I urge you all to see it.

You won't be disappointed.

The Decline and Fall of Robert De Niro

2009-02-04T11:40:00.002-05:00

"The Decline and Fall of Robert De Niro

-OR-

How the Finest Actor of His Generation Sold his Soul to The Paycheck Devil."

How did Robert De Niro go from this...

...to this?

I remember the day. I remember the moment.

I knew the Decline of Robert De Niro came once I saw the trailer for "The Adventures of Rocky & Bullwinkle" (2000).

Do you remember it?

Robert De Niro, playing the Fearless Leader, looks into the camera and says:

"Are you talkin' to me? Are you talkin' to me? But I'm the only one here, so you must be talkin' to ME?"

Yes, that is the precise moment when Robert De Niro sold his soul to the paycheck devil.

(If you really want to experience it, check out the trailer on YouTube, 0:16 - 0:25 is the time-count, it is horrifying).

Not only did De Niro sell-out by taking a shameless paycheck movie but he also ape'd-his performance in "Taxi Driver."

I can only imagine De Niro's agent trying to sell him on the movie.

-Agent: Bobby. Listen, I have this great script, actually, the script is terrible, but the performance is right up your alley. After "Analyze This", I think this would be the perfect follow-up for you. Ready? "Rocky & Bullwinkle". Ha?! Amazing, right?

-De Niro: You mean, the cartoon?

-Agent: Yeah. The cartoon. You always told me you loved it. Well, they're making it into a film, sorta' like "Roger Rabbit", but better. Jason Alexander, you know him, Costanza from "Seinfeld"? He's already attached. But they need someone to play the Fearless Leader. I thought you would be perfect for the part.

-De Niro: The Fearless What?

-Agent: Leader. Bobby, listen to me, when have I given you wrong advice? (Pause) Okay, I know what you're going to say, "Frankenstein". That doesn't count. Anyway, listen, you can play the Fearless Leader like Mike Myers played Dr. Evil. Or, better yet, like how Charlie Chaplin played Hitler in "The Great Dictator."

-De Niro: Hmmm. I don't know. I was thinkin' maybe we can call Marty. See what he's up to...

-Agent: Marty? No, been there, done that like 6 times already. It's time for you to branch-out. You're not getting any younger, no offense, and it's time to think about a new direction in your career...

-De Niro: I don't know. I'm not feeling fearless. It doesn't seem like anything I can really get into.

-Agent: They're offering you 10 million plus a percentage on the back-end. (Pause).

-De Niro: Where do I sign?

How did he go from being Robert "Fuckin'" De Niro to Bob?

Where did it all begin?

Robert De Niro was THE finest actor of his generation. Let's take a quick glance at his memorable work:

From Johnny-Boy in "Mean Streets" (1973) to Vito Corleone in "The Godfather: Part II" (1974) to Travis Bickle in "Taxi Driver" (1976) to Michael in "The Deer Hunter" (1978) to Jake LaMotta in "Raging Bull" (1980) to Al Capone in "The Untouchables" (1987) to Jimmy Conway in "Goodfellas" (1990) to Max Cady in "Cape Fear" (1991) to Ace Rothstein in "Casino" (1995) to Neal McCauley in "Heat" (1995) to Moe Tilden in "Copland" (1997).

Somehow along the way, De Niro had an itch to scratch. And that itch was called...

...Comedy.

After a good, but not great, performance in "Analyse This" (1999), De Niro was convinced that he could make the transition from drama to comedy seamlessly. He was also successful in "Meet the Parents" (2000).

He wanted to wear both masks.

It was all downhill from then on.

Let's take a quick peek at his forgettable performances since he decided to scratch his itch.

From "The Adventures of Rocky & Bullwinkle" (2000) to "Men of Honor" (2000) to "15 Minutes" (2001) to "The Score" (2001) to "Showtime" (2002) to "City by the Sea" (2002) to "Godsend" (2004) to "Hide & Seek" (2005) to "Stardust" (2007) to "Righteous Kill" (2008).

If you look closer at these films, you will notice that not all of them are comedies, some are thrillers, some are fantasy films, etc.

But they all have one-common-denominator.

Plot-driven.

Look closer at De Niro's unforgettable performances. For the most part, all character-driven.

Another factor? Marty.

Out of those 11 Unforgettable Performances, 6 were directed by Marty.

The Marty Factor. They had their own cinematic shorthand language. They knew how far each could be pushed. They were blood brothers. They brought out the best in each other.

After "Casino" (1995), Marty and De Niro went their separate ways.

Was their a rift between the dynamic duo?

I don't think so. Marty was trying out new stuff, "Kundun" (1997), "My Voyage to Italy" (1999), "Bringing out the Dead" (1999).

Meanwhile, De Niro was being sold down the golden river.

They couldn't get on the same page. Marty then made "Gangs of New York" (2002) and "The Aviator" (2004). Daniel Day-Lewis was perfect as Bill The Butcher and there was absolutely no role for De Niro in "The Aviator".

And Marty already had De Niro's replacement in Leonardo DiCaprio.

The New Dynamic Duo was born.

They had one more opportunity in "The Departed" (2006). Marty offered De Niro the role of Frank Costello. Unfortunately, De Niro declined the offer because he was knee-deep in directing "The Good Shepherd". The role of Costello eventually went to Jack Nicholson.

De Niro made a desperate decision and starred opposite Al Pacino in "Righteous Kill" (2008), a lame attempt for both men, to return to their tough-guy roles. It was a failed experiment.

And it looks like De Niro is not stopping there. He is attached to star in "Frankie Machine" (2010), pairing himself up with Michael Mann again. It feels like another painful attempt to recapture his former glory...

"An ex mob hit man (De Niro) living in rural comfort is lured back into his former profession by the scheming son of a Mafia Don."

Originally, this had Marty directing and De Niro starring. This was the film. This was the return of the dynamic duo.

Then it all fell apart. Marty dropped the film and made "Shutter Island" (2009) instead, again with Leo.

Wait, wait, wait. Back-up. Take a look at the log-line of "Frankie Machine."

Do you see what I'm seeing? Can you read between the lies?

Shouldn't it read:

"An ex-A-list-actor (De Niro) living a rural comfort is lured back into his former profession by the scheming director Michael Mann."

Finally, look closer at the title pictures above.

De Niro as Jake LaMotta (young & skinny, old & fat).

These two pictures are a perfect example of De Niro's decline and fall.

De Niro was once the ferocious, raging, pull-no-punches, younger Jake LaMotta. He was an absolute bull. He was a force of nature. A freakin' hurricane. He became that character. He lived it. He breathed it. He would ask his brother, with a straight-face, "Did you fuck my wife?" and then he would beat the shit out of him in front of his wife and kids because he wasn't convinced.

Then, later in his career, De Niro became the hefty, has-been, soft, older Jake LaMotta. He was washed-up. Punch-drunk. Desperately doing any gig he could get. Reciting Shakespeare, making crude jokes. He became that fat-man, puffing on a cigar, looking into a mirror, and pathetically imitating Marlon Brando's character from "On the Waterfront" (1954).

From Robert to Bob.

From A-List to C-List.

From Travis Bickle to Fearless Leader.

From Character to Caricature.

The Actor Formerly Known as Robert De Niro.

Critic Consensus Top 40 Films (2002-2008)

2009-01-30T13:10:00.002-05:00

Having already completed the Critic Consensus's from 2002 to 2008, it's only natural that I made a list detailing the Critic Consensus Top 40 Films.

Unfortunately, the numbers for 2001 are not readily available and, of course, 2009 is just underway, so this list will only comprise the last 7 years.

40. "Babel" (109, 2006)
39. "Once" (113, 2007)
38. "LOTR: The Two Towers" (115, 2002)
37. "Master and Commander" (116, 2003)
36. "The Squid and The Whale" (117, 2005)
35. "Happy-Go Lucky" (122, 2008)
34. "Children of Men" (123, 2006)
33. "Ratatouille" (123.5, 2007)
32. "Army of Shadows" (124, 2006)
31. "Atonement" (124, 2006)
30. "Y Tu Mama Tambien" (125, 2002)
29. "The Incredibles" (126, 2004)
28. "Adaptation" (127, 2002)
27. "Man on Wire" (127, 2008)
26. "Finding Nemo" (129, 2003)
25. "Capturing the Friedmans" (132, 2003)
24. "A History of Violence" (137, 2005)
23. "Far From Heaven" (146, 2002)
22. "Before Sunset" (148, 2004)
21. "Mystic River" (153, 2003)
20. "Borat" (158, 2006)
19. "The Queen" (163, 2006)
18. "Milk" (164, 2008)
17. "Slumdog Millionaire" (164, 2008)
16. "American Splendor" (172.5, 2003)
15. "Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind" (186.5, 2004)
14. "Letters From Iwo Jima" (188, 2006)
13. "There Will Be Blood" (194, 2007)
12. "Million Dollar Baby" (196, 2004)
11. "The Dark Knight" (196, 2008)

10. "Pan's Labyrinth" (198, 2006)
9. "Brokeback Mountain" (212, 2005)
8. "The Departed" (224, 2006)
7. "The Diving Bell and Butterfly" (230, 2007)
6. "Sideways" (233, 2004)
5. "LOTR: The Return of the King" (235.5, 2003)
4. "WALL-E" (263.5, 2008)
3. "United 93" (270, 2006)
2. "Lost in Translation" (284, 2003)
1. "No Country For Old Men" (300, 2007)

Breaking down the numbers, it looks like 2002 had 4 entries, 2003 (7), 2004 (5), 2005 (3), 2006 (9), 2007 (6), 2008 (6).

This will be the last Critic Consensus blog-post until next year.

For some, it is a sad day, even sadder than the day after Thanksgiving, after having gained multiple pounds and still knowing that there will be another month of weight gain to look forward to!

For others, it is a happy day, finally, Continuity Film will be talking about films without gumming up all the works with crazy numbers, stats, and rambling rants.

For me, it was fun. It was fun to blend my interest in film and my addiction to numbers.

At times, it felt like I was squeezing the last remnants out of a bottle of toothpaste, you know what I mean, when you curl it, and curl it, and you have to squeeze with two hands just to get a pitiful drop that is barely enough to brush your teeth in the morning and then your wife reprimands you for throwing away a "perfectly good bottle" after you've almost broken your index finger squeezing so damn hard.

No, she's not a witch, she's my wife.

True love.

Critic Consensus Top Ten Films of 2008 (w/ Oscar Nominations)!

2009-01-22T12:00:00.003-05:00

It's that time of the year again! The Academy just released their 2008 nominations and I will finally release my Critic Consensus Top Ten Films of 2008!

I have a lot to say.

First, let's hit the Critic Consensus.

10. A Christmas Tale (86)
9. Synecdoche, New York (86)
8. The Wrestler (94)
7. Rachel Getting Married (107)
6. Happy-Go-Lucky (122)
5. Man on Wire (127)
4. Milk (164)
3. Slumdog Millionaire (164)
2. The Dark Knight (196)
1. WALL-E (263.5)

And the 2008 Best Picture Nominations are:

-"Slumdog Millionaire" (3, 164)
-"Milk" (4, 164)
-"The Curious Case of Benjamin Button" (19, 56)
-"Frost/Nixon" (20, 48)
-"The Reader" (70, 7)

Wow. "WALL-E" (1, 263.5) & "The Dark Knight" (2, 196) were SNUBBED.

That's ridiculous. Both of these films are incredible and it's criminal that the Academy gave them the cold shoulder.

I can't wait for the excuses.

"WALL-E, oh, great movie, but that's why we have Best Animated Film." BS.

"The Dark Knight, no, too popular, we are still reeling from giving James Cameron the keys to the city with 'Titanic', we learned that lesson already. Anywho, we plan on having a Best Genre Picture for the 2010 Oscars, isn't that great?"

In the immortal words of Vizzini:

"Let me put it this way: have you ever heard or Plato, Aristotle, Socrates?

Morons!"

Let's look back at the numbers, shall we?

The last time the #1 Critic Consensus Film ("CC-Film") wasn't nominated for Best Picture?

-"United 93" (2006) (1, 270)

The last time the #1 and #2 CC-Film weren't nominated for Best Picture?

-Never. Never. Ever. Never. Since 2002, at least one of the Top 2 CC-Films were nominated every year. Not 2008.

Let's look closer at "The Reader". First off, I have not seen the film, but THEY are telling me that it is better than "WALL-E" and "The Dark Knight". Okay, excuse me while I throw-up in my mouth.

-"The Reader" (70, 7). Wow, they really outdid themselves this year. Unprecedented. "The Reader" is officially the worst-rated film EVER* (*2002-2008) nominated for Best Picture, beating out 2004's "Finding Neverland" (62, 6).

The Nominations. This is precisely why the Academy Awards have ZERO credibility. This would be equivalent to having the MLB Players voting for the Hall-of-Fame instead of the MLB Writers.

Let's look at CC-Film History (again, 02-08 only).

This is the weakest class in the last 7 years. Now, this is easy math, so stay with me, 2008 has an average rating of 23.20. (Take 3,4,19,20, & 70, add them up and divide by 5).

Here is the year-by-year rundown.

-02 (9.40)
-03 (7.00)
-04 (19.20)
-05 (7.00)
-06 (6.00)
-07 (6.80)
-08 (23.20)

Therefore, 2006 was the strongest class and 2008 is the worst EVER, and the worst since 2004.

In fact, 2008 is the first year that 3 or more Top Ten films didn't make it into the Best Picture category. In fact, only 2 made it in.

Again, quick-rundown.

-02 (4), 03 (4), 04 (3), 05 (4), 06 (5), 07 (3), 08 (2).

What would you substitute for the Nominations?

-Easy, I would insert "WALL-E" and "The Dark Knight" and I would take out "The Reader" and "Frost/Nixon". I can live with "The Curious Case of Benjamin Button". I actually liked the film, in fact, I liked it better than "Slumdog Millionaire".

I know Roger Ebert says that he couldn't make a Top Ten List because it was such a good year for movies and he was compelled to make a Top Twenty instead (for the record, his vote was the first one DQ'd).

I have to say, Roger, you're full of it and so is the Academy.

Most likely, "Slumdog Millionaire" is going to win and it'll be another forgotten, plagued-by-mediocrity year in film.

Last, "WALL-E". Masterpiece. Better than any animated film. Pixar's best, better than "Finding Nemo". This film is better than "Beauty and the Beast" (which is the only animated film to be nominated for Best Picture).

In fact, in the last 7 years, "WALL-E" (4, 263.5) is #4 on the 2002-2008 list, trailing only "United 93" (3, 270), "Lost in Translation" (2, 284), and "No Country For Old Men" (1, 300).

The Academy has no sense of history.

Do you know where "The Reader" stands in the last 7 years?

#455. Right below "X2: X-Men United".

I demand a recount! I want to know every voter's vote. I think we have the right, as paying-moviegoers, to know who votes for what.

The voting needs to be more transparent.

If Obama wasn't so busy fixing all of Bush's mistakes, he should take this on too...

...right after he fixes the College Football Playoffs!

What If Production: "I Am Legend" (1976)

2009-01-16T11:46:00.001-05:00

What If Production is a new segment to Continuity Film that hypothetically matches a project to a filmmaker and/or actor.

This week’s segment will detail Richard Matheson’s landmark horror novel, “I Am Legend.”

Background:

-Richard Matheson’s novel was published in 1954 and it took place in the near-future (1976-79).

-The novel was “loosely” adapted twice: in “The Last Man on Earth” (1964) & “The Omega Man” (1971).

-Warner Brothers owned rights to the book and John William Carrington and Joyce Hooper Carrington co-wrote an adaptation in 1971 (which, coincidentally, was used as a primer when Mark Protosevich and Akiva Goldsman adapted it in 2007).

-The 2007 version starring Will Smith is a terrible rendition of a fantastic novel. They made the film a starring vehicle for Mr. Smith. Unfortunately, the source material is far bigger than Mr. Smith, not the other way around. They basically took the core concept (the last man on earth surrounded by vampires) and gutted the rest of the details. DO NOT SEE THIS MOVIE. Read the book.

What if?

-The actor playing Robert Neville in 1976 would have to be the following:

-FROM "...a tall man, thirty-six, born of English-German stock...long, determined mouth and bright blue eyes..." (14)

-TO "...a bigger, more relaxed Neville...an evenly paced hermit life had increased his weight to 230 pounds. His face was full, his body broad and muscular underneath the loose-fitting denim he wore...only rarely did he crop his thick blond beard, so that it remained two or three inches from his skin...his hair was thinning, long and straggly..." (120).

Looking back on the period, I narrowed down my search to 3 Actors, the central question being, "Who has the chops and the look?":

-Robert Redford, 40.
-Jon Voight, 38.
-Clint Eastwood, 46.

-I originally had it down to 4, Jeff Bridges (27), being the last, but I deemed him too “unknown” at the time to carry this movie.

Again, looking back on the period, I narrowed down my search to 3 Directors:

-William Friedkin [“The French Connection” (1971) & “The Exorcist” (1973)]
-John Boorman [“Deliverance” (1972)]
-Steven Spielberg [“Jaws” (1975)]

Back to the actors: They needed to be bearded.

-Redford [“Jeremiah Johnson” (1972)]
-Voight [“Coming Home” (1978) combined with his performance in “Deliverance” (1972)]
-Eastwood [“The Outlaw Josey Wales” (1976)]

Out of those three actors, I would have to cancel out Redford, b/c honestly, I think he was too much of a pretty-boy and he wouldn’t be convincing enough as the gruff Robert Neville.

It’s down to Eastwood and Voight.

Hmmm. I have to take a closer look at the Directors before I do a final pairing.

-Friedkin made WB a ton of money for “The Exorcist” and Boorman made “Deliverance” for WB, as well.

-Spielberg had his heart set-on “Close Encounters of the Third Kind” (1977) during that period, but, he could’ve always moved that back.

Imagine the pairing of Spielberg and Eastwood. That would’ve been spectacular. Sure, some of you may say, why not have Eastwood direct Eastwood? Well, at the time, he was still flexing his muscles in the director’s chair and I don’t think WB would’ve given him the opportunity to prove otherwise b/c he didn’t have a high degree of clout (and Clint was ensconced in directing westerns and thrillers anyway).

-Boorman worked with Voight on “Deliverance”, so they had some past chemistry there. But, Boorman had just directed a critical and box-office flop with “Zardoz” (1974), a bizarro-SF-fantasy film starring a scantily-clad Sean Connery.

Let’s just say that Boorman’s performance would’ve cancelled him out, in that case, let’s cancel out Voight too.

-That leaves us with Friedkin and Eastwood. Why not? Friedkin was coming off a string of critical and box-office smashes, he was at the top of his game, so to speak, and WB would’ve trusted him to turn-out a great film. Remember, at the time, tentpole summer blockbusters weren’t the norm, the Industry was still figuring out the wild success (possibly, isolated incident) that was “Jaws”, and this was before “Star Wars” changed everything.

So, there we are. We have Friedkin directing and Clint Eastwood starring.

There are long gaps of silence in the film and Eastwood, after having been The Man Without a Name (and a voice) in Sergio Leone’s Spaghetti Western Trilogy, would’ve been ideal to play the silent, brooding Robert Neville.

Back to the Adaptation.

Instead of disgracefully setting the film in Manhattan (like the 2007 version), the film should follow closely to the book.

Los Angeles, north of Compton. A low-rent area. Suburbs. Sprawling city.

1976: no cell-phones, no internet, no GPS, no satellite TV, nothing.

Barebones isolation, just like in the book.

In terms of the feel/pace: imagine the first 15 silent minutes of "There Will Be Blood" (2007) combined with the island-isolation of Tom Hanks in "Cast Away" (2000).

With all of these hypothetical elements now matched, I think "I Am Legend" (1976), directed by William Friedkin, starring Clint Eastwood, would've had the potential to be a landmark horror film.

Just like the book was.

Critic Consensus Top Ten Films of 2003 & 2002

2009-01-09T16:22:00.012-05:00

I am still tallying 2008's Critic Consensus and I'm waiting on 5 more critics.

If you, Mr/Mrs. LaSalle, Schickel, Puig, Hunter, and Thomson are reading this, HURRY UP! It's the second week of 2009 already!

Therefore, I had to delve into 2003 and 2002 in order to have a full understanding of the Critic Consensus (and I'll only go back to 2002 b/c the data isn't available on metacritic.com from 2001 down).

So, here is the...

...Critic Consensus Top Ten Films of 2003.

10. Spellbound (70)
9. The Fog of War (88)
8. In America (97)
7. Master and Commander (116)
6. Finding Nemo (129)
5. Capturing the Friedmans (132)
4. Mystic River (153)
3. American Splendor (172.5)
2. LOTR: The Return of the King (235.5)
1. Lost in Translation (284)

And the Academy Award Noms were...

-Winner: "LOTR: The Return of the King" (2, 235.5)
-"Lost in Translation" (1, 284)
-"Mystic River" (4, 153)
-"Master and Commander" (7, 116)
-"Seabiscuit" (21, 30)

2003 was a huge year for documentaries, with 3 in the Top Ten and "Capturing the Friedmans" garnering the most votes on record (132).

In terms of the Best Picture Noms, well, that's a tough one. I mean, I would leave the top four on there because they definitely deserved it. "Master and Commander" will go down as one of the best films of this decade (it is in my personal Top Ten All-Time) but...

..."Seabiscuit"??? C'mon, seriously? "Seabiscuit"? This is where the Academy screwed the pooch. They should've nominated Merielles' masterpiece "City of God" (another best film of this decade plus in my Top Ten). If not "City of God", why not "In America"?

"School of Rock" (17, 43) was better received than "Seabiscuit"!

Let's move onto 2002 while we still have time...

...Critic Consensus Top Ten Films of 2002.

10. Gangs of New York (46)
9. The Pianist (85)
8. Chicago (88)
7. Spirited Away (90)
6. About Schmidt (94)
5. Talk to Her (108)
4. LOTR: The Two Towers (115)
3. Y Tu Mama Tambien (125)
2. Adaptation (127)
1. Far From Heaven (146)

And the Academy Award noms were...

-Winner: "Chicago" (8, 88)
-"LOTR: The Two Towers" (4, 115)
-"The Pianist" (9, 85)
-"Gangs of New York" (10, 46)
-"The Hours" (16, 29)

This was a really bad year for Best Picture Noms. Who deserved to be there out of these five?

Honestly, "The Pianist", and that's it. In fact, "The Pianist" should've won that year.

Here is how I would've redone the Noms using the power of hindsight.

-W: "The Pianist" (9, 85)
-"Talk to Her" (5, 108)
-"Adaptation" (2, 127)
-"Bloody Sunday" (21, 19)
-"25th Hour" (96, 1)

"Adaptation" was a close second that year for me, more like a 1(a) to "The Pianist" (1) and Paul Greengrass's "Bloody Sunday" was gut-wrenchingly realistic and ahead of its time.

But the biggest snub of all-time?

Has to be Spike Lee's "25th Hour." That is one of his best movies, ranking right up there with "Summer of Sam", "Malcolm X", and "Do The Right Thing."

It is a shame, a shame that "Windtalkers" (82, 2) and "The Good Girl" (67, 4) had more votes than "25th Hour"!

As Ripley says in "Aliens"...

..."Did IQs just drop sharply while I was away?"

Critic Consensus Top Ten Films of 2005 & 2004

2008-12-30T16:47:00.017-05:00

Okay, in order to quench my addictive personality, I had, HAD to calculate 2005 and 2004! (Don't ask why!)

After giving myself a killer mini-migraine, I felt like Paul Newman in the picture above!

Well, here it is: (this is officially IT, until, of course, 2008 tallies come in).

Critic Consensus Top Ten Films of 2005...

10. 2046 (57)
9. Cache (67)
8. Good Night, and Good Luck (88)
7. Capote (94)
6. King Kong (97.5)
5. Grizzly Man (101)
4. Munich (104)
3. The Squid and The Whale (117)
2. A History of Violence (137)
1. Brokeback Mountain (212)

Let's take a look at that year's Academy Award Nominations:

-Winner: "Crash" (15, 47)
-"Brokeback Mountain" (1, 212)
-"Munich" (4, 108)
-"Capote" (7, 94)
-"Good Night, and Good Luck" (8, 88)

Wow. How the HELL did "Crash" win that year??? I mean, it had some amazing moments and I liked the film, enough to be in my own personal Top Ten of that year, but I never, EVER thought it could win Best Picture.

"Brokeback Mountain" definitely deserved the Top Award. For Christ's sake, even Miranda July's super-indie "Me & You & Everyone You Know" (14, 51) beat out "Crash"!

Biggest Critical Miss? Uhm, can you say "The New World" (43, 15)??? I mean, that film by Malick was a masterpiece! Better than "A Thin Red Line" and definitely better than "The Devil's Rejects" (38, 18), "Kung Fu Hustle" (34, 24), and (don't get me started) "Cinderella Man" (23, 37)! Are you serious? That film was begging moviegoers to see it or they'd be given their money back! What the EFFER??

Whew. All right, let's move onto 2004 before I blow a gasket!

Critic Consensus Top Ten Films of 2004...

10. Moolade (61)
9. Bad Education (75)
8. The Aviator (76)
7. Maria Full of Grace (78)
6. House of Flying Daggers (90)
5. The Incredibles (126)
4. Before Sunset (148)
3. Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind (186.5)
2. Million Dollar Baby (196)
1. Sideways (233)

Again, and the Academy Award Nominations went to:

-Winner: "Million Dollar Baby" (2, 196)
-"Sideways" (1, 233)
-"The Aviator" (8, 76)
-"Ray" (23, 19)
-"Finding Neverland" (62, 6)

Wow. Now, I can understand the Academy digging "Finding Neverland", it was a pretty solid movie, but it was in 62nd place!!?!?!? That's like giving an Olympic track-guy, who fails to qualify for the semi-finals, a spot on the podium.

Then, we have "Ray". That movie was just plain horrible. It was like a Greatest Hits of Ray's life without any emotion or substance.

Who got Robbed in 2004?

"Eternal Sunshine" (3, 186.5)? Seriously. Was this "too difficult" for the Academy? I mean, how can you look at yourself in the mirror, and not pick this film. Critically lauded. Masterpiece.

"Maria Full of Grace" (7, 78)? Hah. Maybe they didn't want to include two indies? Who the heck knows with them.

This is fun.

I hope it is fun for you as well!

Happy New Year!

See you next week!

Critic Consensus Top Ten Films of 2006

2008-12-26T09:06:00.010-05:00

The 2008 Critic Consensus List is still tallying top tens, so, since I did the 2006 version anyway, and I'm still tired and sore after cutting my fingers THRICE while assembling child, and evidently, adult-proof toys for my son Luke, here is the...

...Critic Consensus Top Ten Films of 2006.

10. Little Miss Sunshine (92)
9. Babel (109)
8. Children of Men (123)
7. Army of Shadows (124)
6. Borat (158)
5. The Queen (163)
4. Letters From Iwo Jima (188)
3. Pan's Labyrinth (198)
2. The Departed (224)
1. United 93 (270)

I'm going to do a little wrinkle this week.

Academy Award Best Picture Nominations for 2007.

-Winner: "The Departed" (2, 224)
-"Letters From Iwo Jima" (4, 188)
-"The Queen" (5, 163)
-"Babel" (9, 109)
-"Little Miss Sunshine" (10, 92)

Looking back now, we see that "United 93" was robbed big-time.

In my opinion, the noms should've been:

-"The Departed", "Letters From Iwo Jima", "The Queen", "Children of Men", & "United 93".

"Babel" is not better than "Amores Perros" and "Little Miss Sunshine" was a terrible, terrible mess of a movie.

This is fun, let's look back at the Critic Consensus Top Ten Films of 2007 and compare them to the Academy Award Nominations of 2008.

-Winner: "No Country For Old Men" (1, 300)
-"There Will Be Blood" (3, 194)
-"Atonement" (4, 124)
-"Michael Clayton" (11, 84)
-"Juno" (15, 77)

Again, solely my opinion here, but if I was doing the Noms...

-"No Country For Old Men" (even though, upon second viewing, the film is completely boring and the book is much, much better), "There Will Be Blood" (a masterpiece and probably my favorite film of ALL-TIME), "The Diving Bell and Butterfly" (another masterpiece), "The Lives of Others" (masterpiece theater), & finally "Juno" (which I loved).

Critic Consensus Top Ten Films of 2007

2008-12-19T14:07:00.035-05:00

"The Critic Sees" by Jasper Johns.

If any of you really know me out there, you know that I'm a statistical hound.

I was the type of kid that read Baseball Enyclopedias for breakfast and invented stats before sabermetrics spawned moneyball.

Well, I've decided to blend my statistical background with my film "foreground" and comprise a formula that best illustrates the critical consensus best films of the year.

I'm starting with the Year 2007 because the raw data has already been compiled.

I will update the Year 2008 sometime in January when all the lists are in.

First things first: The Formula.

It's really easy. Even my wife, who is notoriously horrid in math, can figure this out.

I take the Top Ten Lists of the National Critics from The Austin Chronicle to the Washington Post (which are compiled on Metacritic.com) and I allocate the following scores to the list:

1(10 points), 2(9), 3(8), 4(7), 5(6),6(5),7(4),8(3),9(2),10(1).

Criteria: Some critics have a tendency to bend the rules in their favor. This is like a student not doing the homework assignment. This is a TOP TEN List, not a Top Eleven, or a Top Ten and 1/2. TOP TEN.

But I'm willing to be a little lenient. If your (critic's) list has one-tie, then your list is admissable.

Two or more ties?

Sorry, try again next year and maybe read the assignment.

That goes for you: Jonathan Rosenbaum of the Chicago Reader, Scott Foundas & Ella Taylor of the LA Weekly, Kenneth Turan & Carina Chocano of the Los Angeles Times, A.O. Scott & Manohla Dargis of the New York Times, & lastly you, Dennis Harvey of Variety.

Upon further ado, here is the Critic Consensus Top Ten Films of 2007.

10. Zodiac (99)
9. The Lives of Others (99)
8. I'm Not There (102)
7. Into the Wild (104)
6. Once (113)
5. Ratatouille (123.5)
4. Atonement (124)
3. There Will Be Blood (194)
2. The Diving Bell & Butterfly (230)
1. No Country For Old Men (300)

Why, do you ask, does "The Lives of Others" beat out "Zodiac" even though they both have 99?

Easy. Tie-breaker. The first tie-breaker is the highest score (10). They both have 2. The next tie-breaker is the second highest score (9). "The Lives of Others" had more.

If any of you are interested in learning which other films rank on the list, then please either:

1) Name the film in the comment section and I will reply,

OR

2) Pick a number between 11 and 120, and I will glady reply back.

The list spans from "No Country For Old Men" (300) to "The TV Set" (1).

Let's just pick a random number and test the system, I'm thinking...

67?

"A Mighty Heart" (8)

How 'bout...

29?

"Gone Baby Gone" (21)

And last, the year I was born...

'79?

"Blame It on Fidel!"

The End.

Short Film Within a Feature: "Brooks Was Here" from the "The Shawshank Redemption" (1994)

2008-12-13T12:45:00.016-05:00

Brooks Was Here

"Short Film Within a Feature" is a new, ongoing segment of Continuity Film that examines a sequence in a feature film that can stand-alone as its own short film.

There is a sequence in Frank Darabont's "The Shawshank Redemption" (1994) that would make a perfect and powerful short film.

I've titled it "Brooks Was Here" and it is about Brooks Hatlen, an elderly man who struggles to adapt to his new life.

Taken out of the context of "Shawshank", "Brooks Was Here" still works as a short.

A raven crows as we see Brooks Hatlen, an elderly man in what we assume is a library, talking to a raven named Jake. He tells Jake that he can’t take care of him anymore and that he is free.

The raven flies through a window and Brooks is sad.

Brooks shakes hands with Prison Guards as he walks out into the new world.

The piano slowly chimes in, playing a song of melancholy.

Brooks is then seen gripping tightly, with both hands, onto a railing in a bus. He is frightened. He looks like a lost boy.

Brooks is then seen walking down a street carrying a briefcase. A large bus passes by in front of him.

A Voice-Over starts with “Dear fellas…”.

It is Brooks’s voice.

Brooks almost gets hit by a car as he attempts to cross a street.

He uses the word “automobile”, an old term for car, which indicates that he’s been away for awhile.

A door opens and he is given keys to an apartment.

We learn from his VO that the parole board got him a room in a halfway house called “The Brewer” and a job bagging groceries at the Foodway.

He is brow-beaten by a young Store Manager who reminds him to double-bag his groceries.

Birds eat feed as Brooks sits on a park bench. We learn that he goes there and hopes that his raven Jake might show up.

But he never does.

Brooks tosses and turns in his bed. It is night time. We learn that he has trouble sleeping at night, that he has bad dreams of falling, that he wakes up scared and he doesn’t remember where he is.

Brooks contemplates getting a gun and robbing the Foodway, maybe even shooting the Store Manager. What is critical in this scene and VO is that Brooks says: “Maybe I can get a gun and rob the Foodway so that they can send me home.”

Home.

We see Brooks neatly folding his clothes into an open suitcase and he thinks again about the gun and says he’s too old for that nonsense.

While fixing his tie and looking into a mirror, we learn that Brooks is tired of being afraid and decides not to stay.

He pulls out a knife and we automatically fear that he’s going to slit his wrists but instead he looks up and climbs a chair and then a table.

He balances himself on the table as he begins carving something on the wall of the threshold.

Wood fragments fall onto the table, in-between his two feet.

Through the prison-like railings of the threshold, we see Brooks closing his knife and smiling at what he wrote.

We then see the shot of his feet. He raises himself to his tippy-toes.

He balances his feet again and then rocks side-to-side and…

…the table gives way but Brooks is suspended in the air.

His feet shake and we can see the back of his body in the reflection of the mirror in the background.

We track-back from the wall that reads “Brook Was Here” to reveal…

…Brooks hanging from a rope.

Dissolves to:

A letter being read by Andy and his prison-mate Red.

It turns out that the VO of Brooks was his suicide letter to his friends in prison.

Home.

Best Actor Nominations 2009 (Based Solely on Trailers) TAKE 2

2008-12-05T11:45:00.003-05:00

The 2009 Oscar Race just entered the Stretch Run as December is now one-week old.

Months ago, I decided to predict the 2009 Best Actor Nominations (Based Solely on Trailers) as one of my first posts.

Well, things have changed.

The original list included: Sean Penn, "Milk"; Frank Langella, "Frost/Nixon"; Jaime Foxx, "The Soloist"; Heath Ledger, "The Dark Knight"; & Leonardo DiCaprio, "Revolutionary Road."

The updated list has 3 Locks: Penn, Langella, & DiCaprio.

"The Soloist" was pushed back to April, 2009. Therefore, DQ'ing Foxx from 2009 contention.

Plus, the word around the campfire is that Ledger will be nommed for the Best Supporting Actor award to increase his chances of being only the second actor to win a major-acting award posthumously (Peter Finch, "Network" (1976)).

That means there are two spots open.

Well, one just got filled up pretty quick!

Watch the trailer below and see what I mean.

Mickey Rourke -- "The Wrestler" (2008).

Oscar Background: None.

The Clincher: (1:06-1:17) & (1:43-1:44).

Thoughts: Mickey Rourke. Yeah, that's not a typo. Now, if it was all about incredible physique, then Stallone would've been a contender for his HGH-induced role in "Rocky Balboa" a couple of years ago (but that film was garbage, worse than "Rocky 5", which I thought would be impossible to do!). Rourke looks absolutely amazing in this trailer. On face-value, it looks like Rourke has completely immersed himself into the role of Randy "The Ram" Robinson, an amalgam of 1980s washed-up, has-been wrestlers of yesteryear. Sure, it's a redemption-piece, and we've seen that a million times, but this feels different, it feels important. And the film seems to mirror his own up-and-down career in film. From his dazzling start in "Diner" (1982), to his amateur boxing days, to his freak-performance in the Dennis Rodman/Van Damme actioner "Double Team" (1997), to now.

Like his character says in the trailer:

"With a little luck, this could be my ticket back on top."

I hope it is.

Camp Cult Classic: "Flash Gordon" (1980)

2008-11-28T11:03:00.002-05:00

"Flash Gordon" (1980)

"Pathetic Earthlings...WHO can save you know?"

"Flash Gordon. Quarterback. New York Jets!" (That's who!)

Okay. I had way too much XO-Cognac and Turkey last night to put sentences together.

Therefore, this will be a Blog-Lite.

Tastes great, less filling.

Enjoy the Holiday Weekend!

Flash - a-ah - saviour of the universe
Flash - a-ah - he'll save everyone of us
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha
Flash - a-ah - he's a miracle
Flash - a-ah - king of the impossible

He's for everyone of us
Stand for everyone of us
He'll save with a mighty hand
Every man every woman
Every child - with a mighty flash

Flash - a-ah
Flash - a-ah - he'll save everyone of us

Just a man
With a man's courage
He knows nothing but a man
But he can never fail
No one but the pure in heart
May find the golden grail
Oh oh - oh oh
Flash

Opening Sequence: "Patton" (1970)

2008-11-21T15:28:00.001-05:00

"Patton" (1970)

An American Flag fills the frame.

Random chatter is heard in the background.

A-TEN-HUT!!!

The chatter dies as the audience stands at full attention.

Footsteps.

A lone figure, dwarfed by what we now see as a 25-foot American Flag, stands ready and salutes the audience as the bugle plays "To The Colors."

The bugle continues as we see...

Close-Up ("CU") shot of General George S. Patton's saluted hand and his right eye.

CU of Patton's left-hand holding his glove and military baton.

CU of Patton's left-breast heavily decorated with medals of every kind and color. Notice that a Purple Heart stands-out, signifying that this general has been wounded in battle.

Medium Shot ("MS") of Patton, shoulder-to-shoulder, saluting the audience and looking like an American Bald Eagle, especially with those white, bushy eyebrows.

CU of Patton's ivory-handled pistol.

CU of Patton's helmet, with his four general stars.

To The Colors ends and Patton lowers his saluting hand as we go back to the master shot.

"Be seated," Patton commands.

The chairs screech as the soldiers sit down.

Patton starts his monologue (with shot breakdowns)...

Master: "Now, I want you to remember that no bastard ever won a war by dying for his country. He won it by making the other poor dumb bastard die for his country. Men, all this stuff you're heard about America not wanting to fight - wanting to stay out of the war, is a lot of horse dung."

MS: "Americans traditionally love to fight. All real Americans love the sting of battle. When you were kids, you all admired the champion marble shooter, the fastest runner, big league ball players, the toughest boxers. Americans love a winner and will not tolerate a loser. Americans play to win all the time. I wouldn't give a hoot in hell for a man who lost and laughed. That's why Americans have never and will never lose a war, because the very thought of losing is hateful to Americans. Now, an army is a team - it lives, eats, sleeps, fights as a team. This individuality stuff is a bunch of crap. Now, we have the finest food and equipment, the best spirit, and the best men in the world."

CU: "You know, by God, I actually pity those poor bastards we're goin' up against. By God, I do. We're not gonna' shoot the bastard, we're going to cut out their living guts and use them to grease the treads of our tanks. We're going to murder those lousy Hun bastards by the bushel."

Long Shot ("LS"): Now, some of you boys, I know, are wondering whether or not you'll chicken out under fire. Don't worry about it. I can assure you that you will all do your duty. The Nazis are the enemy. Wade into them, spill their blood, shoot them in the belly."

MS: "When you put your hand into a bunch of goo that a moment before was your best friend's face, you'll know what to do."

Master: "Now there's another thing I want you to remember. I don't want to get any messages saying that we are holding our position. We're not holding anything. Let the Hun do that. We are advancing constantly and we're not interested in holding onto anything..."

LS: "...except the enemy. We're gonna' hold onto him by the nose and we're gonna' kick him in the ass. We're going to kick the hell out of him all the time and we're gonna' go through them like crap through goose."

MS: "Now, there's one thing that you men will be able to say when you get back home, and you may thank God for it. Thirty years from now when you're sitting around your fireside with your grandson on your knee, and he asks you: 'What did you do in the Great World War II?', you don't have to say: 'Well...I shoveled shit in Louisiana.'"

CU: "All right now, you sons-of-bitches, you know how I feel and I will be proud to lead your wonderful guys into battle...anytime...anywhere. That's all."

We go back to the Master shot of the American Flag as Patton walks down off-stage.

------------------------

This is one of the most audacious opening sequences in film history.

From the towering American Flag, to the American Bald Eagle-esque Patton galvanizing his troops with tough-love pep-talk, to the bugle-call montage.

It perfectly captures the humungous ego of Patton. Here's a guy who believed, as he stood by the Roman ruins, that he was actually THERE as three Roman legions defeated the Carthiginian Hord two-thousand years ago. As he says, "I was here!".

It is almost as if the 25-foot American Flag is not big enough for Patton. He towers over the scene. The American Flag is the opening act and Patton is the main event.

He talks to the troops about whipping the "Huns", a derogatory gesture to the German Nazis, reducing them to their Germanic Barbarian roots.

He tells them, graphically, that he would use the Hun's guts as grease for the tread of their tanks.

Then, he becomes emotional, telling them that we would be proud to lead them in battle, anytime, anywhere.

But most importantly, he embodies the American Bald Eagle...

...a rare, near-extinct, National bird-of-prey.

Cutting Room Floor: "Terminator 2: Judgment Day" (1991)

2008-11-14T13:40:00.002-05:00

Cutting Room Floor is a new, ongoing segment to Continuity Film that examines "deleted scenes", or scenes left on the cutting-room-floor.

"Terminator 2: Judgment Day" (1991)

The T-1000 walks down a long hallway that leads into John Connor's room.

He stops at the door threshold and looks around. He hears water percolating and he looks left as the camera pans and follows him.

The source of the water is a fish tank. The T-1000 bends down to take a closer look at the fish. His face falls behind a large magnifying glass.

His face is distorted and elongated through the glass. This is a quick character "plant" by James Cameron to show the T-1000's liquid-metal elasticity.

The T-1000 starts touching books, cds, and other material items that belong to John Connor with his fingertips. He is searching for clues. He is gathering information.

The T-1000 is then seen through a mutli-pane prism. Again, another plant by Cameron to remind the audience of his elasticity.

The T-1000 continues touching the computer keyboard and monitor. He runs his fingers along an unmade bed and a Walkman headset.

Finally, he touches the "Public Enemy: Fear of a Black Planet" poster on the wall. This is what he is looking for. Instead of shredding the poster, the T-1000 takes it down to reveal:

A shoebox labeled "Messages from Mom" that fits into a cavity in the wall.

The T-1000 opens the box and rifles through pictures of John Connor's childhood, mother, friends, and most importantly, his past.

This gives the machine the necessary ammunition for his quest to hunt-down and kill John Connor.

He decides to find Sarah Connor...

...where John and the T-800 (Arnold) are destined to be.

James Cameron called this scene a "classic case of underestimating the audience." He was concerned that the audience wouldn't "get" that whatever the T-1000 "touched or made physical contact with, he could sample molecularly."

Originally, the point of this scene was two-fold: a) Show the audience how the T-1000 functioned, how he was able to "read" items molecularly in order to gather information, and b) Show the T-1000 attaining the information he needed in order to track-down John: the whereabouts of his mother, Sarah.

Cameron decided, after having seen the rough cut, to delete this scene because it disrupted the narrative pace of the film.

What is interesting about this scene is the approach taken by Robert Patrick. Patrick decided to touch the items as if he was "reading Braille." It was important for him, and his character, to be tactile oriented. So, instead of just tearing the place apart like Axl Rose in a Motel, he skims the surface of the item, he reads its history.

His programmed curiosity leads him to touch every item so that he can gather information even though he can never "feel" what it means to be human.

Ultimately, this is the downfall of the machines. Their Artificial Intelligence may be far superior to ours, but they can never be human, no matter how many new upgrades that come down the production line, no matter how many T-1000's can morph into a human being.

Cameron's post-production instincts are correct. His decision to cut this scene in order to maintain the narrative pace of the film was the right decision.

Although it may add detail to the T-1000's character, time is better spent following the father/son bonding of the T-800 and John Connor.

Impeccable Scenes: "The Empire Strikes Back" (1980)

2008-11-06T19:57:00.001-05:00

On Bespin's Cloud City, in a class three chamber, carbon freezing is used primarily as a way to capture Tibanna gas for transportation off-world.

Tibanna gas is commonly used as a conducting agent in blasters and other energy weapons and people paid handsomely for Baron Administrator Lando Calrissian's expert services.

He had the market cornered and he was finally making an honest living while deflecting the Mining Guild and the eyes of the Empire.

Even though Calrissian complained about having "supply problems of every kind and labor difficulties", he was proud to be a responsible businessman, and as he said:

"It's the price you pay for being successful."

Carbon freezing was never supposed to be used on living objects...until Darth Vader "suggested" the idea to Calrissian.

Originally, the chamber's function was to capture and carbon freeze Luke Skywalker for his journey to the Emperor and presumably the Dark Side.

Darth Vader, however, decided to test it...

...on Captain Solo.

Carbon steam billows in all directions as the mighty Chewbacca, with a dismembered C-3P0 strapped to his back, anchors the procession that is led by the formidable Boba Fett.

Princess Leia Organa and a bound Captain Han Solo follow Boba Fett up a platform as they are basked in an ominous blue back light.

We see a full shot of a carbon-freezing chamber. A huge mechanical tong retracts toward the ceiling. Lando Calrissian looks directly into the pit of the chamber.

Steam is everywhere.

Stormtroopers appear at the margins of the frame as the procession nears Lando's position.

The notorious mechanically-assisted breathing of Darth Vader invades the full shot as he makes his presence known.

Han Solo asks Lando what's going on and Lando breaks the news that he is being put into carbon freeze.

A two-shot of Han and Leia looking at each other as they are separated in the background by Darth Vader and Boba Fett.

"The Empire will compensate you if he dies," Vader assures Fett.

Chewbacca lets out a wild howl and attacks the Stormtroopers approaching Han.

Boba Fett aims his weapon at Chewbacca but Darth Vader lowers it in order to avoid further mayhem.

Han calms down Chewbacca and reminds him to save his strength as Stormtrooopers bind Chewbacca's hands (which begs the question, Why didn't they do that in the first place? After all, he is a Wookie, he can pull the arm off a gundark, and last time I checked, he does have a life debt with the man you are attempting to carbon freeze!).

Leia shoots a look over to Darth Vader. She is terrified and she back pedals. Maybe she is remembering how Vader tortured her with that interrogation droid on the Death Star? Or maybe Vader is probing her mind?

Han tells Chewbacca that he has to take care of Leia as she stands by Chewbacca's side.

Han then looks at Leia and they passionately kiss.

Han is forcefully removed by Stormtroopers.

"I love you."

"I know."

The Ugnaught engineers unbound Han's hands.

He looks down into the abyss.

The hydraulic platform slowly descends.

Chewbacca howls.

Lando casts a sympathetic eye to Leia and Chewbacca.

Han continues to lock eyes with Leia.

Chewbacca's howl gets louder.

Darth Vader gives an Ugnaught the signal.

Han winces in pain as carbon freeze pours all over is body.

Steam rises in a flourish.

Appearing beyond the steam is the twisted visage of Darth Vader, the Death's Head, accompanied by his mechanically-assisted breathing.

The mechanical tong locks onto the carbonite.

Chewbacca lets out his final lament.

Lando glares at Darth Vader and then focuses his attention on the rising tong.

Chewbacca whimpers. Leia embraces him.

Two Ugnaughts approach a rectangular monolith. They tilt over the monolith, it crashes to the ground with a thud, to reveal...

...Han Solo, encased in carbonite.

Leia instinctively grabs Chewbacca's arm.

Close-up of Han Solo's frozen, ghastly face.

Leia doesn't look away.

Lando bends down. He is face to face with his old buddy.

C-3PO explains...

"...they've encased him in carbonite. He should be quite well-protected, if he survives the freezing process, that is."

Lando adjusts a readout on the carbonite side bar.

Full shot of Lando, bending over Han, his shoulders pinched with Darth Vader and Boba Fett towering over him in the background.

"Well, Calrissian, did he survive?" asks Darth Vader.

"Yes, he's alive. And in perfect hibernation," Lando reluctantly answers.

Darth Vader tells Boba Fett that Han is now his property. He tells the Ugnaughts to reset the chamber for Luke Skywalker.

An officer enters the scene and tells Darth Vader that Luke has landed.

Everything is going as planned.

Lando walks over to Leia and grabs her arm. Chewbacca pulls her back.

"Calrissian, take the princess and the Wookie to my ship," Vader orders.

"You said they'd be left in the city under my supervision," Lando replies.

"I am altering the deal. Pray I don't alter it any further," Vader warns.

Lando's hand instinctively goes to his throat as he turns to Leia, Chewbacca, and C-3PO.

Leia continues to look at Han.

Chewbacca whimpers.

Medium-shot of Han. His hands are palm-up in a gesture of peace.

Shot of Darth Vader leaving the chamber.

Lando looks at Lobot, his trusty cyborg.

Lobot returns Lando's stare.

Lando knows what he has to do next. His path to redemption has begun.

He has to give up the responsible life he worked so hard to achieve.

He has to return to the fringes of the Galaxy.

He has to sacrifice his neutral position in the galactic conflict and join the fight against the Empire.

He has to pick a side.

-------------------------

This is one of my favorite scenes of all-time. It just has so many layers and it is critical to the story.

The heroes have hit rock bottom, compounded with Luke's defeat and loss of his right-hand moments later, and you, the audience, just watched your favorite heroes get their butts kicked over two climactic hours.

The filmmakers gave you a hint of this in: a) the title, duh, and b) the opening sequence, when Luke Skywalker, who you knew before this as a wide-eyed-farmer who turned into a galatic hero, gets knocked unconscious by a wampa on the ice-planet, Hoth.

The carbon-freezing scene is perfect. From the lighting (the blue perimeter background, the reds, the steam, the lowlit faces and the hard shadows) to the performances of the actors (Lando's eyes, in particular) to the pacing of the editing and shot selection/blocking of the director, Irving Kershner.

The scene reaches a level of perfection that can only be described as...

...Impressive. Most impressive.

Production Predictions: "The Hobbit" (2011)

2008-10-31T12:30:00.003-04:00

Unfortunately mislabeled under the "Juvenile Fiction" tag for a long time, "The Hobbit" is a dark, brooding book when read with Peter Jackson's LOTR Trilogy in mind.

Here is my prediction about how Peter Jackson, and more importantly Director Guillermo Del Toro, are going to tackle the adaptation of J.R.R. Tolkien's "The Hobbit."

"The Hobbit" will be Chapters 1 through 8.

"The Hobbit: Part II" will be chapters 9 through 19, plus an added epilogue, bridging the gap between "The Hobbit" and "Fellowship of the Ring."

How do I know that? If I know Peter Jackson, LOTR, and film, I know that Jackson cannot resist splitting the films at the end of Chapter 8.

Here's why.

After the climactic battle sequence in the Spider Lair of Mirkwood, after what should be an amazing cinematic sequence (imagine the Shelob sequence in "Return of the King" times 50 more spiders), the characters need a much deserved rest as they attempt to get back on the trail. Thorin Oakenshield has been captured by the Elven King in Mirkwood. The fellowship, for a lack of a better word, has been broken.

Bilbo, the protagonist of the story, finally emerges as the unlikely hero as he slays a spider with his sword (who he calls "Sting") and frees the dwarves from bondage of the rest of the spiders. He has done something brave. He has done something heroic.

Thorin is now out of the picture and the Dwarves look to Bilbo for leadership.

Balin (a dwarf), as if he is possessed by Gollum, starts speaking in his voice and says...

"Gollum! Well I'm blest! So that's how he sneaked past me is it? Buttons all over the doorstep! Good old Bilbo--Bilbo--Bilbo--bo--bo--bo..."

Cut to Black. Cue Credits. To Be Continued...(Much like the end of "The Two Towers").

Also, as Tolkien even says at the end of Chapter 8, "...but that belongs to the next chapter and the beginning of another adventure in which the hobbit again showed his usefullness."

What else will we see in "The Hobbit"?

Well, for one thing, you will see another storyline involving Gandalf. In the novel, Gandalf conveniently disappears, and reappears througout the narrative.

That is going to change. For one thing, you will see Gandalf's disappearences be explained. He is going off on a search quest. A shadow is lingering in the East. He has been summoned to the Second White Council. Where we will once again see Elrond, Galadriel, and Saruman. He is finding clues about someone called The Necromancer (I won't spoil it for you). Hint, hint, you may see a quick image of the rebuilding of the Dark Tower of Barad-dur (just like the half-completed Death Star in Jedi).

Adaptation Issues:

1) The Dwarves. Cut them down from 13 to 4 or possibly 5. It is comical (and not in a good way) to see 13 dwarves come through Bilbo's door (ONE-BY-ONE) in the opening of the film. It doesn't fit unless you are going to revert back to the Juvenile Fiction tag. I know, some fans out there may call it sacrilege to not include all 13 Dwarves, just like they were blowing hot-air over the fact that Peter Jackson did not include Tom Bombadil in Fellowship, but they'll get over it. Keep the Dwarves that matter: Thorin, Balin, Gloin, Bombur, and Dwalin.

Bifur, Bofur, Dori, Nori, Ori, Fili, Kili, & Oin (I'm not making these names up) can be seen in the Extended Edition to make everyone happy.

2) Take away Smaug's ability to speak! I know, I'm just defiling the whole book now. But the alternative is a speaking Dragon. Okay. That is lame. Like Sean-Connery-Dragonheart-lame. I know that the riddle between Smaug and Bilbo is critical to the story, but, you have to kill your darlings here. Keep the riddle-game between Bilbo and Gollum. Axe Smaug/Bilbo.

3) The Battle of the Five Armies. This is not actually an issue but it is going to be awesome. Combine the Battle of Pelennor Fields and The Battle of Helm's Deep and make it an epic, half-hour, Saving-Private-Ryan-D-Day-esque bloodbath.

4) The Title: "The Hobbit 2", to quote Lee Donowitz from "True Romance", when asking Elliot Blitzer what they plan on calling the sequel to "Coming Home in a Body Bag" (while watching the dailies of the film)...

Lee: What does Joe like?
Elliot: Um...”Body Bags 2".
Lee: Oooo, that's imaginative. I've got more taste in my penis.

"The Hobbit: Part II". Just like "The Godfather Part II."

I'm really looking forward to this film and I hope the collab-combo of Del Toro and Jackson will make it a classic.

Classic Trailers: "The Shining" (1980)

2008-10-24T12:00:00.002-04:00

Stanley Kubrick had two filmmaking commandments. The first commandment was (paraphrasing): that everything had been done before, but it was his responsibility to do things better.

The other commandment Kubrick called the "economy of statement." In Kubrick's mind, every scene, sequence, or composition had to be broken down into its most basic elements first. Then, he would stage/block the sequence that would best explain his intent. Now, Kubrick started off as a photographer. In his creative mind, he saw everything visually first, through the lens, through exposure. Everything was framed.

It was critical for him to economically state the intent of every scene, sequence, and composition.

He was obsessive about the economy of statement and the following "teaser" trailer for "The Shining" (1980) perfectly reflects his second commandment.

Over black.

The ominous score/music of Wendy Carlos & Rachel Elkind kicks-in.

Long shot. Hallway. Twin red, elevator-doors. A chandelier splits the doors. Twin couchs symmetrically positioned. Two paintings symmetrical. The twin motif has been carried over from the two dead twin girls that was see earlier in the film. From Jack Torrance's dual-personality.

The credits, starting with the title "The Shining" in white text, scroll-up.

The music swells. There is a distorted noise. It sounds like a swarm of locusts. A plague of ghosts.

The credits continue their upward climb. This suggests that the elevators may be rising in the shafts. Is something coming?

The music is louder. The distortions are more frequent. Menacing.

Finally, when the credit "Directed By Stanley Kubrick" is just about to cross the top part of the frame and the chandelier, an unknown liquid pours out of the left-elevator door.

It is blood.

The blood flows profusely down the hallway. It splatters against the walls.

The music reaches a fever pitch.

The blood collides with the camera.

The blood drips down the camera. It acts as a filter. The image is now distorted. Congealed.

The couch floats aimlessly in the river of blood.

The title once again appears.

The score has reached its zenith.

Quick cut to a paperback cover of the novel.

Redrum.

REDrum.

RedRUM.

REDRUM.

Opening Sequence: "8 1/2" (1963)

2008-10-17T08:45:00.001-04:00

After the smashing international success of "La Dolce Vita" (1960), Federico Fellini fell into a deep, drawn out "director's block" (his words).

A paralyzing, inspirational void.

A phantom zone of creativity.

At that point in his career, Fellini always picked up where he left off. He never had a large gap between films. His next film was always gestating in his mind as he was finishing up post-production on his current film.

However, something happened after the long, post-production process of "La Dolce Vita."

Fellini had no clue which film he was going to do next. He was lost. He poured so much of what he wanted to say in "La Dolce Vita."

His fear of losing his creative voice had come true.

Just sit back and imagine this for a minute. Put yourself in Fellini's shoes. Ever since he was young, he had a gift of imagination and creativity. He had made 7 1/2 (one co-directed) films over a period of 10 years. He was on top of the world of cinema. He was the maestro.

And all of a sudden, it was gone.

Eventually, Fellini had the idea of making a film about a writer going through writer's block, but that morphed into a director going through director's block in what would become his masterpiece, "8 1/2" (1963).

This is a traffic jam as Purgatory.

This is a film director, Guido Anselmi (Fellini's alter-ego), having a mid-life crisis in pre-production.

After the opening credit sequence, we start out beyond the back glass of Guido's moving car.

The car stops in a bumper-to-bumper traffic jam.

A man, in the backseat of the car in front of Guido, looks directly at him. This will become an ongoing theme of the opening sequence. All eyes on Guido.

A sweeping shot of the jam. Notice how Guido's car is in shadow, underneath the tunnel. Whereas, the light of the exterior is a short distance away. However, in this type of limbo, it can be an eternity before he reaches the light.

The cause of the jam is ambiguous. It's not important in Fellini's world. The point of this introduction is the jam, not its cause.

Guido looks to the left and sees a man, in another car, looking at him. Freeze frame. He then sees a woman asleep at the wheel. Freeze frame.

Pan right. Guido grabs a hanky and cleans a smudge on his windshield. The problem? There is no smudge. The windshield is flawlessly clean.

More people are staring at him.

Then, a mysterious smoke appears inside his car.

Guido begins to panic. He turns a dial on his center console. Nothing. He attempts to open the driver's door. Nothing.

Then, the terrifying shot of a bus-load of headless arms. People continue to stare at him.

Guido's breathing gets heavier. He slams on the driver's door again. Nothing. He reaches over and pulls the passenger door handle.

Nothing. He is trapped.

He frantically slams his palms on the passenger door glass. We can hear his flesh streak on the cold glass.

The car is becoming his coffin. It is no coincidence that his car resembles a hearse. A car for the dead.

We pan right and see a man looking at Guido. Freeze frame.

Guido is now slamming on the passenger quarter glass. Full panic mode.

Quick cut to a cigarette-smoking-lecherous-old-man caressing the bare shoulder of Carla, Guido's mistress.

Guido crawls out of the sunroof of his car. He resembles a black salamander. A tadpole with a black tie. He is a creature of Purgatory. The car, which was once his coffin, has now become a womb.

Guido is being reborn.

Guido floats above the cars toward the light at the end of the tunnel. He raises his hands and accepts the light as he passes below power lines.

Guido is flying above the clouds. The sun is in the distance. Heaven is in his sights.

We see a flash image of a half-erected monstrosity that is a setpiece of Guido's abandoned film.

Cut to the shore as a man on a horse rambles to the right side of the frame. Another man in a turtleneck sweater pulls on a kite string.

Cut to Guido's leg tied to the end of the rope/string. His ascension to Heaven is tethered to the string of a kite. This is Heaven, interrupted.

The turtleneck man tugs violently on the rope.

Guido tries desperately to untie the rope. This umbilical cord to earth. To Purgatory.

Finally, Guido is pulled back down to Earth. His body falls toward the breaking waves of the shore.

Toward water. Toward life.

Before he actually crashes into the water, we hear heavy breathing.

Guido wakes up. His hand outstretched toward the ceiling of his room.

Toward God.

------------------------------------

This opening sequence expertly sets the tone for the rest of the film.

It represents the Duality of an Italian Man.

Between Madonna and Whore. Between Wife and Mistress. Between Reality and Fantasy.

Fellini decides to open his film with an anxiety dream laced with a nightmare. The sequence encapsulates the fears and desires that have governed Guido/Fellini's life.

He is trapped. Everyone is looking at him. They are waiting for his next direction. They are waiting for his next film. They are waiting for Fellini to be Fellini.

Fellini wants liberation from his director's block. He is looking for a way out.

What Fellini finally realizes that he must do is to go through the block instead of working around it.

He makes a film about a director making a film. But it's much more than that.

It is about a man who has lost his boyhood imagination. A man who has lost his inner-child and inner-voice.

Fellini courageously examines his past through "8 1/2." His childhood. The moments in his life that have defined his existence. The moments that he will always cherish.

Fellini exorcises the demons of his temporary inspirational void and comes out reborn.

He was lost and his now found.

Opening Sequence: "The Lion King" (1994)

2008-10-07T10:15:00.000-04:00

*Opening Sequence will be an ongoing series that breaks down cinema's best opening sequences.*

"The Lion King" (1994)

The sun rises and Lebo Morake's Zulu chant explodes onto the scene and ushers the audience into an epic, animated experience.

Mbongeni Ngema and the rest of African Chorus join the chant as we are shown various animals in their environments as they are summoned to Pride Rock.

As a giraffe and her calf step out into the sunlight, the first verse (sung by Carmen Twillie) begins:

From the day we arrive on the planet
And blinking, step into the sun
There's more to see than can ever be seen
More to do than can ever be done

Watch closely (1:09 - 1:15): Ants, in focus foreground, are carrying leaves along a branch. A blur of animals run out-of-focus in the background. Rack-focus from ants on the branch to zebras trotting in the same direction as the rest of the herds.

Simple, yes. But an animated feature having a rack-focus just adds to the magic of the moment. They are using camera techniques that exist solely in the real world. By including this technique into an animated world only increases its critical value. Another example would be a lens flare, which you find quite often now in animations.

As the massive congregation of animals make their way to Pride Rock, the camera tilts up and follows Zazu, a hornbill.

It's the Circle of Life
And it moves us all
Through despair and hope
Through faith and love

Zazu lands on Pride Rock and bows in front of King Mufasa. Shot from a low-angle, King Mufasa looks regal and menacing. After all, he is the King of the Jungle and its most feared resident. King Mufasa bows and smiles, erasing any fear that the audience has that he is a threat. This is an important introduction and distinction. The lion sits on top of the food chain, he is the most feared because he is the most powerful. But in this incarnation, he merely governs the chain. Instead of plundering its resources, he distributes its wealth.

Gourds on top of a walking stick make their way through the crowd.

Holding the stick is Rafiki, an old baboon, who acts as Pride Land's shaman. He climbs up Pride Rock and hugs King Mufasa. They are old friends.

Rafiki and King Mufasa look and see Sarabi cradling the infant-born Simba. The song enters its bridge as Sarabi licks the top of Simba's head.

Rafiki shakes his crooked stick and the gourds rattle. Simba playfully attempts to hit the gourds.

Rafiki breaks open a gourd and smears its juice across Simba's brow. He then takes a handful of dirt and sprinkles it over Simba's head.

This is Simba's baptism by sand.

Rafiki carefully picks up Simba and carries him to the edge of Pride Rock.

The African Chorus's chant swells.

Rafiki triumphantly thrusts Simba up for all to see.

It's the Circle of Life
And it moves us all

The animals react with glee: elephants trumpet; monkeys applaud; and zebras stomp.

The camera starts behind Simba and circles around to get his reaction.

The sky. A shaft of sunlight shines down through the clouds on the future king.

The animals bow and kneel.

In the Circle
The Circle of Life

Rafiki holds Simba high. King Mufasa and Sarabi watch and stand proud.

The shaft of sun encompasses them all.

The camera tracks back to reveal all the animals fixed on one moment.

The annointing of the future king.

The music abruptly STOPS!

TITLE CARD (Red letters over Black Screen):

"THE LION KING".

Okay. Take a breath.

You're going to need it.

What makes this opening even more impressive is that the filmmaker's bracket it at the end. A great touch for an overall terrific film.

This is one of my all-time favorite opening sequences and it sets the standard for every film I see.

The only other film that captures my attention in a similar fashion is Alfonso Cuaron's brilliant "Children of Men" (2006), which adopts the same flash/cut to title card.

Carmen Twillie perfectly sums it up best:

"And it moves us all."

Indeed.

Best Actor Nominations 2009 (Based Solely on Trailers).

2008-10-03T11:31:00.000-04:00

My wife can vouch for me.

I have successfully picked the last two Academy Award Best Actor Winners based solely on the merits of the film's trailer.

Seriously, you can ask her.

As you know, Forest Whitaker won in 2007 for "The Last King of Scotland" (2006) and Daniel Day-Lewis won in 2008 for "There Will Be Blood" (2007).

I've decided to up the ante.

Instead of predicting the Best Actor, I'm going to predict ALL FIVE BEST ACTOR NOMINEES, based solely on trailers.

Here's the lowdown. I will give you the Actor, Oscar Background, Thoughts, and the Trailer. I will also give you my "Clincher" moment. This will be the moment in the trailer that clinches my gut feeling about the nomination.

Check back with me on January 22nd, 2009 when the Academy releases their nominees.

I'm not a betting man, but if I was...

__________________________________________________________

Sean Penn -- "Milk" (2008)

Oscar Background: Nominated 1996, "Dead Man Walking" (1995); Nominated 2000, "Sweet and Lowdown" (1999); Nominated 2002, "I Am Sam" (2001); Nominated/Won 2004 "Mystic River" (2003).

The Clincher: (1:27 - 1:31) & (1:45 - 1:51).

Thoughts: Having misfired in his last attempt to grab a nomination in "All the King's Men" (2006), Penn returns in what looks like his finest performance yet. Coupled with a re-energized Gus Van Sant, who hasn't made a mainstream film since his redudant "Finding Forrester" (2000), Penn is an absolute lock to get one of the noms.

Frank Langella -- "Frost/Nixon" (2008)

Oscar Background: None.

The Clincher: (1:02 - 1:04), (1:38 - 1:40), (1:52 - 1:55), & (2:18 - 2:21).

Thoughts: He won Best Lead Actor in a Play at the 2007 Tony Awards for his role as Richard Nixon in "Frost/Nixon." This is a far cry from his forgettable performance as the over-the-top pirate Dawg Brown in "Cutthroat Island" (1995). He has recently regained some steam with solid performances in "Good Night and Good Luck" (2005) and "Starting Out in the Evening" (2007). The big question is: Where will Langella's Nixon rank? Is it more Anthony Hopkins in "Nixon" (1995) or Dan Hedaya in "Dick" (1999)? He is this year's dark horse.

Heath Ledger -- "The Dark Knight" (2008)

Oscar Background: Nominated 2006, "Brokeback Mountain" (2005).

The Clincher: (0:44 - 1:02).

Thoughts: I have already seen this film, twice. However, once I saw this trailer, I knew Ledger was going to knock-it-out-of-the-park. Just an awesome, jaw-dropping performance by Ledger in a fantastic all-around film. This is my second lock.

Jamie Foxx -- "The Soloist" (2008)

Oscar Background: Nominated/Won 2005, "Ray" (2004); Nominated, Best Supporting, 2005, "Collateral" (2004).

The Clincher: (0:36 - 0:54).

Thoughts: I have reservations about this pick. The Academy loves handicapped, be it mentally or physically, performances by their actors (see Dustin Hoffman, Daniel Day-Lewis, Tom Hanks, Al Pacino, Leonardo DiCaprio, just to name a few). However, my gut tells me that Foxx is going to fall short. But the odds of getting a nom are in his favor.

Leonardo DiCaprio -- "Revolutionary Road" (2008)

Oscar Background: Nominated, Best Supporting, 1994, "What's Eating Gilbert Grape" (1993); Nominated 2005, "The Aviator" (2004); Nominated 2007, "Blood Diamond" (2006).

The Clincher: (1:02 - 1:12) & (1:14 - 1:26).

Thoughts: I believe Leo is the finest actor of our generation and before his career is over, he should get at least one Oscar. This film looks good. Leo playing a Suburban Man in a era of conformity. This could be his year.

Gordon Gekko's Take on the Bailout Bill.

2008-10-03T11:30:00.001-04:00

Gordon Gekko (1987)

We caught up with Gordon Gekko at his beach house in East Hampton, New York. Gekko & Co. is still going strong. The company has a NetWorth of $650 Million. Multiple SEC investigations failed to unearth any wrongdoing on Mr. Gekko's alleged insider-trading scandal in 1987. Although heavily fined, Mr. Gekko continues to pioneer the field of risk arbitrage.

Just don't mention Bud Fox, Bluestar, or Teldar Paper.

This is really a nice beach house, Mr. Gekko.

Gordon Gekko: Yeah, not bad for a City College boy. I bought my way in, now all these Ivy league schmucks are sucking my kneecaps.

Do you still talk to Larry Wildman?

Gordon Gekko: Sir Larry Wildman. Like all Brits, he thinks he was born with a better pot to piss in.

Mr. Gekko. The US Economy is perilously close to a recession. As someone who was around during the last "Crash" in 1987, we hoped that you can shed some light on the current state of the economy. The Government is proposing a 700-Billion-Dollar Bailout Bill. How much is enough?

Everyone keeps mentioning the word "greed" as a main ingredient to the demise of the financial market. Can greed, for a lack of a better word, be good?

You inspired a whole generation of investment bankers. What do you think of this new generation and do you at all feel responsible for their villianous behavior?

Thank you Gordon for taking time out of your busy schedule to talk to us today. I hope we can do this again. How about lunch?

Gordon Gekko: Lunch is for wimps.

It was just a suggestion. I thought we were...

Gordon Gekko: If you need a friend, get a dog.

But Mr. Gekko. I have a dog. And I respectfully disagree with your worldview...

Gordon Gekko: Jesus, if this guy owned a funeral parlor nobody would die!

Bluestar! Bluestar! Bud Fox! Teldar Paper!

Gordon Gekko: When I get a hold of the son of a bitch who leaked this, I'm gonna tear his eyeballs out and I'm gonna suck his fucking skull.

End of transmission............................................