Thursday, January 22, 2009

Critic Consensus Top Ten Films of 2008 (w/ Oscar Nominations)!













It's that time of the year again! The Academy just released their 2008 nominations and I will finally release my Critic Consensus Top Ten Films of 2008!

I have a lot to say.

First, let's hit the Critic Consensus.

10. A Christmas Tale (86)
9. Synecdoche, New York (86)
8. The Wrestler (94)
7. Rachel Getting Married (107)
6. Happy-Go-Lucky (122)
5. Man on Wire (127)
4. Milk (164)
3. Slumdog Millionaire (164)
2. The Dark Knight (196)
1. WALL-E (263.5)

And the 2008 Best Picture Nominations are:

-"Slumdog Millionaire" (3, 164)
-"Milk" (4, 164)
-"The Curious Case of Benjamin Button" (19, 56)
-"Frost/Nixon" (20, 48)
-"The Reader" (70, 7)

Wow. "WALL-E" (1, 263.5) & "The Dark Knight" (2, 196) were SNUBBED.

That's ridiculous. Both of these films are incredible and it's criminal that the Academy gave them the cold shoulder.

I can't wait for the excuses.

"WALL-E, oh, great movie, but that's why we have Best Animated Film." BS.

"The Dark Knight, no, too popular, we are still reeling from giving James Cameron the keys to the city with 'Titanic', we learned that lesson already. Anywho, we plan on having a Best Genre Picture for the 2010 Oscars, isn't that great?"

In the immortal words of Vizzini:

"Let me put it this way: have you ever heard or Plato, Aristotle, Socrates?

Morons!"

Let's look back at the numbers, shall we?

The last time the #1 Critic Consensus Film ("CC-Film") wasn't nominated for Best Picture?

-"United 93" (2006) (1, 270)

The last time the #1 and #2 CC-Film weren't nominated for Best Picture?

-Never. Never. Ever. Never. Since 2002, at least one of the Top 2 CC-Films were nominated every year. Not 2008.

Let's look closer at "The Reader". First off, I have not seen the film, but THEY are telling me that it is better than "WALL-E" and "The Dark Knight". Okay, excuse me while I throw-up in my mouth.

-"The Reader" (70, 7). Wow, they really outdid themselves this year. Unprecedented. "The Reader" is officially the worst-rated film EVER* (*2002-2008) nominated for Best Picture, beating out 2004's "Finding Neverland" (62, 6).

The Nominations. This is precisely why the Academy Awards have ZERO credibility. This would be equivalent to having the MLB Players voting for the Hall-of-Fame instead of the MLB Writers.

Let's look at CC-Film History (again, 02-08 only).

This is the weakest class in the last 7 years. Now, this is easy math, so stay with me, 2008 has an average rating of 23.20. (Take 3,4,19,20, & 70, add them up and divide by 5).

Here is the year-by-year rundown.

-02 (9.40)
-03 (7.00)
-04 (19.20)
-05 (7.00)
-06 (6.00)
-07 (6.80)
-08 (23.20)

Therefore, 2006 was the strongest class and 2008 is the worst EVER, and the worst since 2004.

In fact, 2008 is the first year that 3 or more Top Ten films didn't make it into the Best Picture category. In fact, only 2 made it in.

Again, quick-rundown.

-02 (4), 03 (4), 04 (3), 05 (4), 06 (5), 07 (3), 08 (2).

What would you substitute for the Nominations?

-Easy, I would insert "WALL-E" and "The Dark Knight" and I would take out "The Reader" and "Frost/Nixon". I can live with "The Curious Case of Benjamin Button". I actually liked the film, in fact, I liked it better than "Slumdog Millionaire".

I know Roger Ebert says that he couldn't make a Top Ten List because it was such a good year for movies and he was compelled to make a Top Twenty instead (for the record, his vote was the first one DQ'd).

I have to say, Roger, you're full of it and so is the Academy.

Most likely, "Slumdog Millionaire" is going to win and it'll be another forgotten, plagued-by-mediocrity year in film.

Last, "WALL-E". Masterpiece. Better than any animated film. Pixar's best, better than "Finding Nemo". This film is better than "Beauty and the Beast" (which is the only animated film to be nominated for Best Picture).

In fact, in the last 7 years, "WALL-E" (4, 263.5) is #4 on the 2002-2008 list, trailing only "United 93" (3, 270), "Lost in Translation" (2, 284), and "No Country For Old Men" (1, 300).

The Academy has no sense of history.

Do you know where "The Reader" stands in the last 7 years?

#455. Right below "X2: X-Men United".

I demand a recount! I want to know every voter's vote. I think we have the right, as paying-moviegoers, to know who votes for what.

The voting needs to be more transparent.

If Obama wasn't so busy fixing all of Bush's mistakes, he should take this on too...

...right after he fixes the College Football Playoffs!

6 comments:

Unknown said...

Benjamin Button? Really. that movie wasnt very good.

lizzygannon said...

what the hell are you talking about? and what exactly do all of those numbers mean? let's hear your thoughts on the films! i still have a bunch to see but i thought revolutionary road was the snubbed pic. and benjamin button should have been titled forrest gump 2.

Unknown said...

and Wall-E? seriously maybe Disney/Pixar can try to make a movie where they dont anthropomorphize animals, plants, robots and inanimate objects. also the movie tries to act like its teaching you about consumerism and corporations and becoming fat and stupid but its made by one of the largest corporations that thrives on that culture.

lizzygannon said...

the olsens have spoken!

seriously, i loved rachel getting married.

bd said...

If you haven't seen SLUMDOG yet, I can understand thinking that this is a moribund year for movies. That pic may singlehandedly save the year for me...

Sam Vaccaro said...

Besides Clint getting snubbed for Best Actor and Dark Knight for Best Pic, Bruce Sprinsteen song for "The Wrestler" was far better than any of the 2 for Slumdog. Bad choices again for music nods Academy.