Trailer Trash: How Bad Trailers Ruin Good Movies. Exhibit A: "In Bruges" (2008).

"In Bruges" (2008) is a great movie. Probably in my Top Ten of 2008.

It's that good.

The theatrical trailer is trash. It completely strips the film of its emotional core. It is a classic Marketing FUBAR.

Trailer Trash: How Bad Trailers Ruin Good Movies is a new segment to Continuity Film.

Before I go in-depth with the trailer, I'd like to start first by looking at the Poster (see above).

The poster for "In Bruges" is a blood-splattered post-card. The 3 Main Characters (Harry, Ray, & Ken) are split in three panels, each with Bruges scenery in the background, and they all hold guns. The tagline on the bottom right is: "Shoot first. Sightsee later." Colin Farrell's character Ray is in the center panel, holding a revolver in one hand and a pint of beer in the other.

The poster is terrible and the Marketing Department of Focus Features should fire whoever the heck was in charge of this film.

"Shoot first. Sightsee later." Wow. How original. Yeah, you know what, I, "White Male Demographic 18-34" is so ensconced in my XBOX 360 and I'm so sick of my fridge full of beer and cold pizza that I need to drop everything and see a film with a tagline like that! Oh wait, sorry, I will go because Colin Farrell, who I have a man-crush on, is holding a revolver and a beer, a BEER, how cool is that?

Let's take a look at this masterpiece of a trailer, shall we?



I remember seeing the trailer in the movie theater sometime last year with Rebecca. I specifically remember telling her, "Wow. That looks embrassing."

The trailer starts off with Ray (Farrell) in a confessional booth with a Priest. It is revealed that Ray has committed murder. The Priest asks him who. Ray says, "You Father."

Blam. Blam. Blam.

Cuts to a bunch of people saying "Bruges."

We then see a bunch of random images with sub-title cards: "They Were Supposed to Disappear"..."Blend In"..."And Wait For the Boss to Call"...

We hear a phone message of a bunch of f-bombs being bleeped-out (which, btw, is annoying as hell to listen to in a theater).

More sub-title cards: "In Bruges..."..."If You Can't Hide Out"..."You Get Taken Out."

Suddenly, there is a guitar riff from that crap-song "The Impression That I Get" by The Mighty Mighty Bosstones. Like I didn't hear that song enough from my Sophmore year roomate in College. And that was 1999.

It is followed by a series of MTV-Video Circa 1999 fast-cuts of random images.

Finally, to put a cherry on top of an already horrific trailer, they throw in the dwarf/midget for good measure.

It's funny, because Colin Farrell's character Ray, perfectly sums up what I felt, and what I imagine 90% of the audience felt after they watched this horrorshow...

"If I'd grown up in a farm and was retarded, Bruges might impress me, but I didn't, so it doesn't..."

Ditto.

Okay, after seeing that trailer, would you honestly think that it would get nominated for Best Original Screenplay?

No? Well, it did.

After seeing the trailer, would you honestly think that Colin Farrell and Brendan Gleeson would both be nominated for Best Supporting Actor in a Comedy/Musical at the Golden Globes?

No? They did.

In fact, it is probably Colin Farrell's best performance.

Wow, Anthony, since the trailer doesn't do the film justice at all, what is the film actually about?

Well, I'm glad you finally asked.

"In Bruges" is a dark comedy. In fact, it's more of a dark dramedy (drama/comedy).

The closest film I could compare it to would be Gary Fleder's "Things to Do in Denver When You're Dead" (1995), which is an underrated film that got caught in the post-Pulp Fiction maelstrom.

The film is about two Irish guys who have been sent to Bruges. Bruges?

It's in Belgium.

It is the oldest Medieval city in all of Europe (or, so the movie says).

We eventually find out that these two blokes are hitmen who are taking a leave of absence after a botched hit.

Ken (Gleeson) is the veteran. He's a normal guy, just like you and me. He's not a ruthless, by-the-numbers, assassin. He's a fat guy who likes history and art and he's loving Bruges. He's the professional.

Ray (Farrell) is the rookie. He's a hot-headed blowhard who hates Bruges, hates history, and would piss on the Mona Lisa if he was drunk enough. He's green. He's new at this game and he's still trying to figure out the rules.

Ken and Ray are waiting for word from their boss, Harry (Fiennes), the expletive-laden madman who we primarily hear through the receiver of a telephone.

That's all you need to know.

The film is at times hilarious, touching, funny, poignant, and startingly original.

"In Bruges" is a character-driven film about hitmen with feelings. They are not video-game-automatons who shoot first and ask questions last.

These guys shoot first and cry about it later on.

They are normal guys who have a job to do. They don't necessarily like it, but it's all they know.

They're like blue collar hitmen.

I urge you all to see it.

You won't be disappointed.